hi guys,
I just wanna thank whoever started this site. it has been alot of help and alot of hurt for me to actually acknowlegde the reality of things. (whatever that means right) I let a buddy of mine read my story and he told me it was sad. I guess that is how i have always felt about myself sad. always me me me but its hard to say anything else when you are the one dealing with things in your head. sorry only time i get to write on this site is when im at work. so my spelling might be kinda screwed up. there are so many things i wanna say and its hard i have all the right things to say in my head but when it is put into actual words it comes out all screwed up. I guess you can say there is this like a wall in my mind which doesnt let my thoughts out. what i really wanna say. what i really feel. its hard you know when you think u aint got nobody and you feel as if noone understands. I wear a big smile but behind it is alot of hurt. this sounds like rambling huh? im sorry . next time ill think things out more clearly. anyhow thanks for listening whoever you guys are and would like to thank you once again for sharing your ideas and thoughts. auggie sad-puppy

Auggie,

So good to hear from you again.

I think you're being too hard on yourself, my friend. First of all, if you are sad and you're feeling sad then that's all you need to say. Sometimes we think that we have to be eloquent writers or speakers when all we really have to be is who we are....

Just know that if you are logging onto this web site, if you are finding some comfort and/or identifying with others, then you've taken a big step toward healing.

I, too, feel fortunate to have found this web site, and it's in sharing our stories and not feeling like I'm the only one in the world who feels he's screwed up that I have found strength and inspiration.

It would be my personal wish, Auggie, that you log on whenever you can and just let us know what's happening from time to time. No matter what you say - or how it comes out - it's what you need to be doing...and it's just fine with me.

Hang in there, man.....we're all in this together.

Dynamite Don

Hi Auggie,

I read your story. I just wanted to welcome you here. I'm glad you found us.

God Bless,

Brian

augie
welcome - it didn't sound like rambling to me - I understood from it that you were lonely and that you feel like there is a wall when you try to talk about what is inside -

familiar feelings for me too - my wall was and is denial - it feels like a great numbness and it likes to creep back in on me when I don't keep my eye on it - aloneness sucks but I believe that if I keep working on myself I might be fit for having a real and nurishing relationship with someone someday - in the mean time I try to talk or write here when I feel down - (but now even when I feel ok)-

post often (if it feels right) there are no literary critics in here (as far as I know)

thad

augie, I indetify with your stuggle, as I am on the path of sorting reality out of chaos. I think there are many levels of denial, and just plain shock about what really happened to us. Getting the responses of others is helping me to get where I can more easily grieve the loses, and do some healing. I hope u find this as well.

Keep on posting!