Got something to throw out to you....Catch!
After this weekend, I started feeling a bit "stupid", for posting last week. Or I guess the better word is embarrased. I don't know, I was desperate when I posted, and for some reason, I started thinking that I would be laughed at, that somebody would know me and I would be shamed. But I am glad I looked back and realized that it was all in my head.
I think a lot of people think like that when they start out dealing with the heavy issues that sexual abuse involves.
If you look closely, you will see that you are talking about your initial feelings concerning the group here. Sure, they are in your head, but I firmly believe we have to take a more positive approach to our feelings.
Don't dismiss them because you think they are bad or misleading. They are signals flagging an area YOU need to work on. "I am new here. I feel insecure. Will I be believed?" That set of feelings got dealt with pretty fast, but others will be tougher to crack. But the point is you CAN do it! I would say honor your feelings and work with them. That in itself will help you deal with them and not get overwhelmed and emotionally exhausted.
On the other hand, remember that feelings are one thing and the truth they convey is another. "I feel ashamed", okay, that's a feeling: work with it and see what can be done to address that feeling of shame. But don't allow it to trick you into accepting the conclusion "I am a shameful woman".
Just some thoughts from a guy with too much free time on a Saturday evening in cold foggy Germany.