Newest Members
beatcook, MassGuy, wiresguy1, AustinChemist, wild_turky
12276 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
4113 (60), Andre M, (36), catchup22 (62), jim OCA 7 (57), sidhearthur (55), SkyClad (65)
Who's Online
2 registered (ethereo222, 1 invisible), 17 Guests and 3 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12276 Members
73 Forums
63164 Topics
441711 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#5819 - 09/16/02 06:11 PM About the retreat
Don-NY Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/06/02
Posts: 546
Loc: Long Island, NY
I can't write about it yet, except to say two things.

I am extremely grateful and happy that I was able to go.

The second thing is that it reinforced something I know but don't always do; to ask for what I need.

Right now, I need private messages. Please send me one.

Donald

_________________________
If you understand everything, some things are just as they are. If you understand nothing, things are still just as they are.

Top
#5820 - 09/27/02 01:07 PM Re: About the retreat
JamesMichael Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/24/02
Posts: 134
Time's up. How was the retreat?


Top
#5821 - 09/27/02 04:40 PM Re: About the retreat
Ken Followell Offline
President
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 12/30/01
Posts: 989
Loc: Bradenton, FL
I was also at the retreat. The experience of the retreat is difficult to put in words. It truly is one of those "You had to be there experiences".

That said, the retreat is a time of feeling a part of community in a way that the internet can not provide and I have rarely felt in other places. As survivors, we truly are brothers and at the retreat is a place where the feeling I imagine as family to others can exist for me. As many of you, I grew up in a sick family. Although my parents were not my perps, they also were not someone I could go to about it. At the retreat I can recieve the love and acceptance I missed and be nurtured in a way I have not experienced else where. I am cared for and cared about. Expereincing that at a retreat gives me the courage to look for it in my life away from the retreat.

At the retreat I also see my brothers who have been on this path a long time, some have totally healed and others are still moving forward. This gives me hope for what is still available for me. I also see brothers who have just begun to heal and that allows me to see how for I am from where I started. That is such a gift.

That is all I have to say right now but I would be happy to answer any questions anyone has about the retreats. It would be great if we could all get together some where and clelbrate the strength we have and the compassion we feel for each other.

Ken

_________________________
Ken Followell

Everything works out right in the end. If things are not working right, it isn't the end yet. Don't let it bother you, relax and keep on goin
- Michael C. Muhammad

"I get up. I walk. I fall down. Meanwhile, I keep dancing."
� Rabbi Hillel

Top
#5822 - 09/28/02 04:48 AM Re: About the retreat
Don-NY Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/06/02
Posts: 546
Loc: Long Island, NY
To write about the retreat in detail would take much away from it. It is a journey and a process and an unfolding and a joining, both inward and outward, which occurs among and because of the company of other survivors.

There were tears and laughter. There was total respect and unconditional acceptance, even during a disagreement.

This was not an artificial, hothouse environment of good vibes, political correctness, new age feel good dogma, or value-free psycho-babble.

This was 45 human beings being as authentic, vulnerable, passionate, and compassionate as they were able to be. As the hours passed, you could see these qualities grow and spread.

I agree with what KenF has said above. And I will also answer any specific questions you may have as best as I can.

In closing, I'm pasting below something I wrote on my evaluation of the retreat (with one line added here). This is in response to the question, "What would you say to someone who was trying to decide whether to register for a retreat?"

Advice to potential participants:
Go.
Go when you feel you are ready.
Go if someone you trust feels you are ready.
If the opportunity and the means coincide, go even if you feel you are not quite ready.
Go if you feel you are stuck and need something to get you moving again.
You will be helped and you will help.
You will hear and recognize your own self, your own life, your hopes and your fears in the faces and postures and words of your fellows, and they in yours.
You will finally know, in a way beyond thought, that you are not alone.
You have nothing real to fear, and much to gain.
Just go.
You deserve to and you need to.
Go for yourself and for the other men who will be there.

Peace to you all,
Donald
******************************************
You can be Captain of your Ship, but not of the Sea

_________________________
If you understand everything, some things are just as they are. If you understand nothing, things are still just as they are.

Top
#5823 - 09/28/02 04:40 PM Re: About the retreat
Ron_dup1 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/13/02
Posts: 87
Loc: Arkansas
I too attended the retreat. It was my first and all I can say is that it was the most intense, emotional, healing, loving, accepting, growing, and wonderful weekend of my life!
I learned more about myself in 3 days than I have in the past 3 months of therapy! The facillatators and participants were all amazing people. There was a unique bond because we all knew why we were there. The walls came down quickly for most and slower for some (like me), but as the weekend went on I too felt fully safe and fully accepted. That was a totaly new feeling for me and I loved it!!!
I hope all of you will consider attending the next retreat. You'll be glad you did.
Ronny


Top
#5824 - 09/28/02 05:06 PM Re: About the retreat
MrDon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/08/01
Posts: 957
Loc: Deltona, FL
I didn't go to the retreat but I have gone to some survivor conferences before and I know from those experiences that there is so much power in getting together with other survivors. I remember the first time I went to one conference and it was like "wow", I am not alone.. I could actually see, touch, reach out and communicate with others in a very real way. I would encourage anyone who is thinking about going to a conference or retreat to do it! It will change your life forever!

Don

_________________________
In order to journey to new worlds, we must first be willing to lose site of the shore.

The Mind Body Thoughts Blog
http://mindbodythoughts.blogspot.com/

Check out my relaxing piano music from the heart!
http://www.donshetterly.com

Top
#5825 - 09/29/02 11:33 AM Re: About the retreat
michael Joseph Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
Hi everyone, I have been more emotional lately, not sure if it is the retreat or not.

Wish I could get some hugs.

_________________________
Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

Top
#5826 - 09/29/02 11:44 AM Re: About the retreat
New to this Offline
Member

Registered: 09/16/02
Posts: 138
Loc: Mississippi
Hang in there. Check your private messages.

_________________________
"Knowledge itself is power" Francis Bacon

Top
#5827 - 09/29/02 02:05 PM Re: About the retreat
MrDon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/08/01
Posts: 957
Loc: Deltona, FL
Not the real thing, but here is a cyber ""HUG""

_________________________
In order to journey to new worlds, we must first be willing to lose site of the shore.

The Mind Body Thoughts Blog
http://mindbodythoughts.blogspot.com/

Check out my relaxing piano music from the heart!
http://www.donshetterly.com

Top
#5828 - 10/01/02 12:57 AM Re: About the retreat
Mark Crawford Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/30/02
Posts: 73
Loc: New Jersey
I also attended the retreat and it was awesome. It was truely amazing to me. After having spent several years in therapy and coming such a long way, I also had an opportunity to see the work I still have to do, but this is a good thing.

I couldn't express in words, any better then Ken, Don or Ron already have....I want to again tell you....scroll back up and AGAIN read Don's "advice to potential participants". HE IS RIGHT ON!

I myself had very mixed feelings about attending after I had registered but knew it was something I had to experience....I am so glad I did. You will be too.

Ron, how are you doing? I am thrilled to see your post and to know what a positive experience the retreat was for you \:\) Mark Crawford


Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.