Newest Members
BusterJones, Desperateforhelp, aniceguy, Green_Lantern, Safe11ride
12121 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
corvairman1 (43), marianne (44), son (35), speedy (31)
Who's Online
2 registered (Cthulhu, thevision), 67 Guests and 3 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12121 Members
73 Forums
62524 Topics
438157 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 3 of 3 < 1 2 3
Topic Options
#55345 - 09/22/06 04:42 PM Re: Does it ever end?
Jaysen Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 680
I don't like the idea that even if you get to a place in your life where you can deal with it, it never just goes away. I don't want to be 50 something (if I live that long) and still be the guy who was abused. I know there's no way to get out of that. I just don't like it.


Top
#55346 - 09/22/06 06:39 PM Re: Does it ever end?
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA
Jay,

That's because right now you are still taking responsibility for some of the things that happened. So part of the shame also belongs to you.

Eventually you will get past that one as well. It's a matter of first believing that NONE of the abuse was your fault, then learning to BELIEVE what you know, and then learning to TRUST these solid beliefs is tools you can use to rebuild your life.

You make a significant statement here:

Quote:
I don't want to be 50 something (if I live that long) and still be the guy who was abused.
This goes back to that thread where I was arguing against allowing abuse to define us. Your statement shows how damaging this can be. You are JAYSEN, who has a cool bike, an ability with tools and machines, a band, a talent for music, and lots of other things. Does the fact that you were abused cancel all that out? Only if you allow it to. And why should you do that?

At 50 you will be Jaysen, not Abused Jaysen. IF that is what you insist on and work for.

Much love,
Larry

_________________________
Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)

Top
#55347 - 09/22/06 07:37 PM Re: Does it ever end?
Jaysen Offline
Member

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 680
Well shit Larry you don't have to yell at me! \:\)

No I won't allow all that to cancel out who I am or who I want to be. I'm not abused Jay, I'm just jay. As far as taking responsibility for some of the things that happened, you're right, there's one or two things left that I need to get past.


Top
Page 3 of 3 < 1 2 3


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.