Late one night I was walking home and I walked past a porn store, and I was approached by a man who asked for a cigarette. I gave him one, and we started to talk. He showed me the gay porn he bought and asked if I liked it. I said yes. He asked if I want to fool around. I told him oral sex only, at my place, and he had to pay for it. He agreed, and we got in his car.

As we started to drive, I told him that we were going the wrong way. He said if we went to his place he would give me more alcohol to drink, and I agreed. We got to his place, and he handed me a drink. I tried it and told him it tasted funny. He said it was because I didn't have that type of drink before which was true. That one drink started to severely effect me. I had trouble thinking and in particular moving.

He saw this and dragged me to his bedroom. He pulled down my pants, threw me on the bed face down, and started to push my face into the bed while yelling threats of physical violence, sexual insults, and graphic descriptions of how he was going to rape me. He was pushing my face so hard into the bed, I couldn't breathe. I started to lose consciousness, but he stopped. He then repeated this several times. I thought he was going to kill me.

He then twisted my arm behind my back so hard I thought he was going to break it. I was pinned down and found myself with almost no ability to move. He then entered me from behind unlubricated and without a condom. The pain was indescribable. This seemed to last forever. He stopped and left the room. I tried to get up, but I could barely move. He came back onto the room and raped me again.

After he was done, he pulled me up, pulled on my pants, dragged me to the front door, and literally threw me out. I hit the concrete very hard face first. I was recovering from what I now know to be a drugged drink, but not well enough to walk. I was there for several minutes until he opened the door again and pulled me back into his apartment. He said if I was laying there, someone would see me and call the police. He called a cab, and when it came he dragged my to the cab, through me in, gave the cabbie money, and told him to bring me back to the porn store.

Once the cab got there I got out and stumbled badly for the two block walk to my apartment. I was bruised, bleeding, and still in an enormous amount of pain. I lay in my bed for what seemed to be a day or two without trying to get up.

I told no one that I was raped for over 16 years until I recently confided the experience to a friend. This is the first time I am giving a detailed account.

Edited by ModTeam (04/14/15 07:25 AM)
Edit Reason: Added trigger warning