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#469432 - 08/27/14 11:48 PM How do you nurture your inner infant?
gaatt Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 124
Hi y'all,

I was struggling with my body today and my mood after connecting with a deep seated anger at my mother's "martyr" trip. I recognized it as the anger of a newborn who was being badly neglected and subtly abused. So as I repeated a question that I often use to pull me out of a funk these days (How can I love myself right now?), I started some chanting which led to a chant specifically used to bless children (and can be used to bless an inner child). Then I thought that that was a good direction to follow so I started to wonder about other ways that I could nurture the infant in me. I thought of a distance healing technique I learned in Quantum Touch and the two handed writing that I learned through Lucia Cappacione's books. I also seemed to spontaneous talk to that infant part in me.

Do any of you guys work on healing your inner infant? How do you do it?

Cheers,

"GAATT"


Edited by gaatt (08/28/14 12:18 AM)
Edit Reason: correct typo
_________________________
"Love yourself and watch...Today, Tomorrow, Always." Buddha.

My Story: http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=468661#Post468661

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#469437 - 08/28/14 12:27 AM Re: How do you nurture your inner infant? [Re: gaatt]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 815
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Hi Gaatt,

I was severely battered, sexually abused, smothered with pillows and manually strangled in infancy, so it's a big issue with me. It is also why it has been so tragically difficult for me to make progress in teaching myself healthier ways of thinking.

My experience is that somehow awareness all by itself is healing. From there, my experience is that what I need seems to show up when I need it. I attended an 18 day personal growth retreat 20 years ago that focused on regressing back to in utero, did 4 different rebirthing techniques, and then took me stepwise up to age 12 and "regrew" me.

For me this was the beginning of 20 years of awareness of my damaged infant self. So, for me it has been a process of 20 years of collecting skills and doing tiny, tiny clearings to get me to the place where I am moving into my damaged infant self more directly.

What I have been conscious of doing for a few years now is growing the container that is me as continuously as I am able, so as to hold more and more of me in consciousness. This happens as I clear more and more of the obstacles to consciousness--ABUSE! As I grow myself and am able to hold more and more of myself in consciousness, I become more able to consciously hold my infant self, release the rage and hopelessness stored in my infant self, while having an adult presence intact that is able to allow my damaged infant self to express all he needs to while feeling the safety of a mature adult me.

This has been no small feat, and is an ongoing process. My experience is that the trauma written in infancy is particularly hard to shift, but it is happening for me day by day. Very tough work to be in that level of trauma, feel the trauma, and also to maintain a detached awareness capable of holding my infant self in safety--where he can "re-grow" in an atmosphere of safety--while being able to short circuit the old previously unconscious impulses and not act out.

You will find your own answers that are unique to you, IMO.

Sending you love and support in providing the safety your infant self needs to heal.

Don
_________________________
Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

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#469454 - 08/28/14 06:30 PM Re: How do you nurture your inner infant? [Re: don64]
gaatt Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 124
Hi Don,

Thanks! it's very helpful for me to hear of your journey to heal the infant in you.

Originally Posted By: don64
My experience is that the trauma written in infancy is particularly hard to shift, but it is happening for me day by day. Very tough work to be in that level of trauma, feel the trauma, and also to maintain a detached awareness capable of holding my infant self in safety--where he can "re-grow" in an atmosphere of safety--while being able to short circuit the old previously unconscious impulses and not act out.

I'm getting a similar impression in myself. I don't think I've ever experienced anger at my mother's ego trip before. It was too heavily protected by my father's. I stumbled upon a website today that suggesting using flower essences to support the development of an inner father and inner mother. This concept is intriguing me today. What would a healthy father say and do? What would a healthy mother say and do too? It's helping me fire the inner voices that come from the parents of my youth and replace them with healthier ones.

Thanks for sharing your healing practices with me. It's nice to know I'm not alone.

Love, your friend,

"GAATT"

PS: What is IMO?


Edited by gaatt (08/28/14 06:32 PM)
Edit Reason: add PS
_________________________
"Love yourself and watch...Today, Tomorrow, Always." Buddha.

My Story: http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=468661#Post468661

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#469467 - 08/28/14 08:59 PM Re: How do you nurture your inner infant? [Re: gaatt]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 815
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Hi Gaatt,

IMO = in my opinion, and you are definitely not alone! Finding safe ways to release the pent up rage towards my mother seems central for me. I didn't begin to remember the sexual abuse from my mother until spring of 2013. And, it is an unpredictable process for me, in that as I understand and clear on issues of me in relation to others, I will have pockets of mother rage that surface.

I know this may be a tricky issue for you, Gaatt, since your mother is an important part of your life. I'm just sending you love and good will in the process, and a wish for you finding ways to keep yourself safe as you clear on the old stuff without creating unintended complications in the present.

I went through a period of meditating on flower essences about 15-18 years ago. I don't remember any specifics now, but it was helpful at the time. Trust your intuition.

Love, your friend, too,

Don
_________________________
Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

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#469469 - 08/28/14 09:19 PM Re: How do you nurture your inner infant? [Re: don64]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
I went through a stage where I had a lot of inner children. Yes, I had DID. I had a tape (cd would do fine) of children's music. The music was very cheery children's music with the voices of children heard. It was healing music.

I had made a diagram of all the inner children I knew about, with names. Often they don't know their name and so you might give them a name.

Then I thought up an agenda for the session. The agenda was to communicate with a particular inner child in that session. So, if that child speaks English you can call him and say you want to play the music for them.

Then you put yourself into a deep relaxation and call the child to listen. At the end, have a brief conversation.

If the inner child hasn't learned to talk yet, then you will probably find they can sense your mind in a manner even without talking.

Puffer





Edited by pufferfish (08/28/14 09:24 PM)

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