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#468740 - 08/10/14 02:51 AM What's Not
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6509
Loc: Terminus
I'm seeing in very harsh and realistic terms what is not possible in this fight for life when we don't have support from others.

A really hard and painful day, week, month...leaves a new streak of pain and turmoil all by itself. That is, going through hell in flashbacks or depression, and realizing that there is no one to talk to for grounding, leads to the conclusion that you are really on your own.

And how do you move forward when you know that you are on your own?
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When the phone don't ring, I'll know its you.

The Aftermath Video

My Absolute Hero!

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#468755 - 08/10/14 03:30 PM Re: What's Not [Re: Still]
HD001 Offline


Registered: 07/30/12
Posts: 262
Loc: us
That's a really good question. You're right we are all on our own at the end of the day. The battles we fight within ourselves are our alone. People can listen to us talk about them. But no one can really join us in them.
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Everything comes from within

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#468803 - 08/11/14 09:11 PM Re: What's Not [Re: HD001]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6509
Loc: Terminus
Originally Posted By: HD001
That's a really good question. You're right we are all on our own at the end of the day. The battles we fight within ourselves are our alone. People can listen to us talk about them. But no one can really join us in them.


I'd settle for just one close friend or fam member who I know cared I existed before I fell apart...before I revealed what was behind the mask.

See them scurry?
_________________________
When the phone don't ring, I'll know its you.

The Aftermath Video

My Absolute Hero!

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#468815 - 08/12/14 02:40 AM Re: What's Not [Re: Still]
tbkkfile Offline


Registered: 09/16/13
Posts: 228
Loc: Surrey, United Kingdom
Hi Still

You have 12000 people here who care about you, we won't run, we won't scurry away, we are always here for you.

Personally you have many times given me the courage to continue, you have my respect and gratitude.

David

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#468827 - 08/12/14 12:56 PM Re: What's Not [Re: Still]
Obi Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1342
Loc: kansas
still,

it still breaks my heart to see you continue to hurt yourself in this manner. to constantly reaching out to people that you want desperately, and i understand why, to accept and care and love that boy in you from back then. these few people that you are reaching out to don't care and/or don't understand nor do they want to understand. you reach out to them to only getting your hand slapped over and over again, furthering your depression, all the while you have several people here that are reaching out to you.

i admire you hanging onto hope, because sometimes that is all we have, that perhaps someday one of these people that you are constantly reaching out to may turn around and say sorry for being complete tools and take you in.... i just don't see that happening, still. you've been doing this for years and not once has any of these people truly offered their love and compassion towards you...

it truly does hurt me to see you wanting that so bad only to be constantly denied...

please accept the hands of those here on ms that have been reaching back to you to give you that love and compassion.


Edited by Obi (08/12/14 12:58 PM)
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live another day. climb a little higher.

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#468846 - 08/12/14 09:15 PM Re: What's Not [Re: Still]
gettingstronger Offline


Registered: 09/24/13
Posts: 175
Loc: Virginia
Hi Still,

I'm sending you all my support as well. Even if no one else responds, you have us. We know what it's like, we're fighting the same battles, we have the same victories and setbacks, and we know how hard it can be at times just to make it from one day to the next.

I'm sorry these people are so shallow and reluctant to get involved. Like Obi and the other guys above have said, you have over 12,000 guys here who are with you 100%, ALL the time. And we don't run. That includes me.

Reach out here and stay in touch. I know from long experience that isolation is one of the worst parts of this, so don't be a stranger. We're here.

Bob


Edited by gettingstronger (08/12/14 09:17 PM)
_________________________
Never worry about "three steps forward and two steps back." Thirty steps forward and twenty back are still ten steps in the right direction.

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#468965 - 08/15/14 11:10 AM Re: What's Not [Re: Still]
HD001 Offline


Registered: 07/30/12
Posts: 262
Loc: us
The others are right you have a lot of support here. And I know you have offered me support in the past and I have been grateful for it. I do hope that you find people who won't scurry away from you. It makes me sad that this has been the reaction you've received from those you care about. It was probably the reactioned you feared most from them as well. I know it would be for me at least. When I disclosed and needed to talk about my past I lost a lot of friends. But not everyone is like that. There are those of us who can handle the heavy stuff. I apologize if my previous response sounded callous. I've been going through a very lonely time myself and I fear my badittude(as we call it here in my neck of the woods) may have bleed through. Hang in there and we will leave the light on for ya.
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Everything comes from within

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