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#468239 - 07/30/14 06:58 PM silly clever science humour
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
So, a neutron walked into a bar and said "I'd like a beer, please."

After the bartender gave him one, he said "How much will that be?"

"For you?" said the bartender "No charge."
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#468240 - 07/30/14 06:59 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
Two atoms walk into a bar.

One says to the other, "Oh, no... I think I've lost an electron!"

"What... are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm positive!"
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#468241 - 07/30/14 07:00 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
So the bartender says, "Slow down, buddy. What's the rush?"

A Tachyon runs into a bar and says "Gimme a beer, now! I need it yesterday."
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#468242 - 07/30/14 07:07 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
An electron walks into a bar.

The bartender asks him how he's doing.

The electron says, "Life sucks.
I lost my job.
My dog died.
My wife dumped me.
The kids ran away.
My wallet was stolen and my car was towed.
I just want to die."

To which the bartender replied, "You gotta stop being so negative."
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#468243 - 07/30/14 07:13 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
A Higgs-Boson walks into a catholic church.

The priest says "Sorry, due to scriptural restrictions on blasphemy and heresy,
we can't allow so-called 'God particles' in here."

The Higgs-Boson says "But without me you can't have mass."
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#468244 - 07/30/14 07:14 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
A neutrino walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "Get out! We don't serve your kind here."

The neutrino says, "Don't mind me; I'm just passing through."
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#468245 - 07/30/14 07:15 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar... and doesn't.
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#468247 - 07/30/14 07:16 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
A photon walks into a bar and says, "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?"
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#468248 - 07/30/14 07:18 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
Helium walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What can I get you?"

Helium doesn't react.
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#468249 - 07/30/14 07:19 PM Re: smart funny science humour [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3362
Loc: O Kanada
A parasite walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "You're not welcome here!"

The parasite says, "Well, you're not a very good host."
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