It's been a few hours since the "blow up" and I hope things have settled down a bit and you feel more in control of how you're coping. I know in my own situation getting away from parents was like a whole new life of freedom. Obviously, I don't know your personal situation, but sometimes family relationships are just too toxic to try to deal with. Parents can cause such pain and heart ache. I wish I had some great advice to offer, but I don't, I can only say my thoughts are with you in this difficult, difficult situation.
Never, never, never, never give up...Winston Churchill