Are you scared he's going to do it again? What is the bag exactly? My man tried consistently for a few months a year. Id spend days on end watching him. Couldn't go to sleep. Im going to call the police, your mum. Yes I will call your mum. Just engaging him in a fight sometimes to keep him preoccupied & from putting the noose around his neck. I did try & have him committed. Id call the police but he'd tell them stories & of course they wouldn't believe me.
I don't worry about him doing that anymore. Things have somehow changed. Drugs & alcohol are really bad as you say. Hope & setting achievable goals are the best things for depression. Purpose I guess. It does hurt.
Guess Im just wondering if you can reassure yourself by seeing what's changed in that time? Is he wounded from it physically? Its a desperate act driven out of being purely overwhelmed in my experience. Just swamped with no way out from the drama in your head. Sedatives can help ease the pain in the mind short term & ssris antidepressants can help longer term with anxiety & depression but usually they play up peoples libido. Its really hard when somebody's' only hanging on to you & you only. But its not ou responsibility. Im not taking blame for murder I never committed. I make that clear because he can get anything he wants if he were to hold that card over me. Can be a head*@# alright I know.
Sorry if I've just stressed you out more. Im no good at these things. All the best