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#465482 - 05/18/14 10:42 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
On The Fringe Offline


Registered: 09/21/13
Posts: 326
Loc: Southeast USA
Hi Learning

I agree heartily. An atmosphere of tolerance and acceptance is great to grow.

My wife is my best friend and partner on the journey to normalcy.
_________________________
I feel more like I do now than I did when I got here.

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#469761 - 09/06/14 12:32 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
journey4two Offline


Registered: 08/26/14
Posts: 39
I realize this was posted some time ago, but I thought it was so beautiful that I had to comment. Wonderful encouragement (and a few knowing tears).

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#474899 - 01/11/15 08:33 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
WontGiveUp Offline


Registered: 02/12/13
Posts: 42
Reading this gives me hope. THANKYOU so much.....

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#474959 - 01/12/15 09:50 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
lucybrown Offline


Registered: 01/12/15
Posts: 3
Thank you for this post. I come here regularly but only joined today because it's very difficult being married to a survivor who isolates and lashes out at me after 23 years of marriage. I'll be honest--this last year during his first in therapy--has put me in a place of not knowing if I can do this anymore. Being berated and screamed at and abused and frightened for so many years is taking its toll. But this post really helped me realize that maybe I can help. Just by being here. It hasn't worked so far because he doesn't trust anyone, not even me. My being here and loving him hasn't helped or proved to him that I love him. He hasn't really realized yet what he's doing when he slips into that other guy--the one who abuses me. Waiting 23 years for a man who actually sees me, who notices that I'm alive and actually asks "How are you?" or who respects me as a full human being while I keep our entire family running is a very hard place to be. But because of this post, I'll keep trying. Thank you.

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#475005 - 01/13/15 01:36 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
DaiseyLady Offline


Registered: 12/22/14
Posts: 11
Hi LucyBrown,

I'd like to PM you but it looks like you haven't tuned it on yet. Glad you found a supportive place.

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#475013 - 01/13/15 03:09 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
Mishka95673 Offline


Registered: 01/03/15
Posts: 309
.


Edited by Mishka95673 (07/14/15 08:44 PM)

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#475226 - 01/16/15 09:50 AM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
lucybrown Offline


Registered: 01/12/15
Posts: 3
Thank you, DaiseyLady and Mishka95673. I'm pretty sure his therapist knows how I feel. It sounds like you've been through something very similar and I appreciate you sharing with me here. When the screaming and accusations start I know he's not himself and I know he's not really talking to me...he's talking to his abuser. But after so many years of this, I'm finding it hard to sit here and take the abuse meant for someone else. I feel done at those moments. Just done. We talk about it a lot, but if that behavior doesn't stop, then my staying here will damage my kids. I don't want them growing up in a place where they see this sort of thing and think it's okay. I don't want them to marry abusive people.

I keep my PM turned off because I work long hours and answer 100+ emails for my job every day. But thank you both for your posts. It's somehow nice to feel not alone, even though I wish my life was different vs. finding support in order to continue enduring this abuse. I'm so glad I finally posted something.

Thank you! And thank you again for this original post learning2luvme. It helped me see a lot of things.

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#475230 - 01/16/15 12:07 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
DaiseyLady Offline


Registered: 12/22/14
Posts: 11
LB,

I so get the 100+ emails a day thing smile

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#475236 - 01/16/15 12:51 PM Re: Thank you Honey for not giving up on me :-) [Re: learning2luvme]
Mishka95673 Offline


Registered: 01/03/15
Posts: 309
.


Edited by Mishka95673 (07/14/15 08:43 PM)

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