Thank you for sharing your poetry with us. I am sorry to read it, but I do not think that your vulnerability from being abused makes you what you convinced yourself you were based on what your dad said. Both men have done tremendous damage to you as an innocent child and they had absolutely no right to do that to you. They were the disgusting shits.
You're a good person with bad stuff that happened to you- which was not your choice. But now you have the capacity for decision-making!!
,,Nun ging es immerzu, weit, weit bis an der Welt Ende."