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#462644 - 03/15/14 03:16 AM Being BOLD
Magellan Offline

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1564
Loc: California
I applied for and got accepted into a 3 month program for improv, which will result in a few public performances at the end of the 3 months.

One thing my recovery from CSA in the last few years has taught me was to learn to trust my heart, to follow my heart, and to take risks while following the intuition of my heart. It has led me to taking several uncomfortable steps in directions my mind would say I'm crazy for pursuing. But each time I followed my heart, I have experienced immense growth.

Improvisational acting seems to have some sort of direct and profound impact on PTSD symptoms. I shall follow this path as long as I can, until I find that my heart leads me somewhere else.

#462645 - 03/15/14 04:05 AM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
Jude Offline

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1633
Loc: New England
Fantastic D! Let us know when you will be hosting SNL.

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Sarah McLachlan

#462651 - 03/15/14 05:10 AM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
don64 Offline

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 1104
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Congratulations for following your heart. Don
Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

#462662 - 03/15/14 08:58 AM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
traveler Offline

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3887
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Good for you, D!

wishing you all the best.


"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"

#462675 - 03/15/14 01:48 PM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
jas4159 Offline

Registered: 06/16/11
Posts: 371
I love improvational acting. I also act. parttime on camera and stage. and it was very useful in expressing myself

congrate on your 3 month program and good luck with it.



#462692 - 03/15/14 06:14 PM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
justplainme Offline

Registered: 09/01/09
Posts: 462

"Survivors need an opportunity to define their own sexuality in their own terms, rather than in reaction to the abuse, so that they stop allowing their offenders to have power over them sexually."

#462762 - 03/17/14 06:44 PM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
Magellan Offline

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1564
Loc: California
Well it appears I lucked out with this improv troupe. The director of the troupe is also a therapist, and actually designed this particular troupe to be therapeutic.

We had our first 'rehearsal' last night and she had us doing all sorts of weird exercises (like moving around and making funny noises). Doing it was jarring, but watching other people do it was mesmerizing. Group building and bonding exercises. To help build group cohesion, bonding, and building trust and repoire.

I can't stop thinking about the experience I had last night. And I can't wait to see how this group develops over the next 3 months.

Thanks for the support guys. I'm still extremely depressed because I'm lonely and I don't know how to make friends. I'll be admitting these faults to this group, and hope that I don't have the same emotional reaction that I have whenever someone 'tries to help' - feeling like a moron because someone is trying to help me for being a moron (not knowing how to make friends).

Also, I think I want to try MDMA in a therapy session. I keep encountering articles about how MDMA has helped thousands of people with PTSD overcome their fears and anxieties.

I've been trying for 30 years now and my life has become more and more lonely. I can feel it in my bones. I hate living this way and I'm angry that I was even born at all.

#462790 - 03/18/14 06:36 AM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]

Registered: 08/31/11
Posts: 2699

I am happy for your excitement about your improv group. Congratulations and I hope it proves to be an outlet that allows you enjoy and see the good in yourself. It will allow you see you have much to offer. Being and interacting with others will hopefully bring you a sense of belonging. You have been inspiration for many now it is your time to enjoy and live the life you deserve.

Enjoy improv!!!


#462912 - 03/20/14 07:32 PM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
Suwanee Offline
Chat Moderator

Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 1075
Loc: Southeast USA

I'm two things: jealous AND very happy for you. I love that kind of stuff. I'm an extrovert of sorts who loves the challenge of winning over an audience. Part of it is CSA leftovers---and part is ADHD---but improv---whether it be a presentation where I "wing it", or true improv like you are talking about gets the dopamine flowing.

It is very much a cathartic exercise to be able to assume another role if only temporarily. Best of luck---and enjoy the experience. May it take you in an unexpected and helpful direction.

I ask you to judge me by the enemies I have made. ---FDR


Cruel Summer
My Journal

#462950 - 03/21/14 04:49 PM Re: Being BOLD [Re: Magellan]
risingagain Offline

Registered: 11/09/10
Posts: 597
Loc: Vancouver, BC, Canada
Originally Posted By: Magellan
One thing my recovery from CSA in the last few years has taught me was to learn to trust my heart, to follow my heart, and to take risks while following the intuition of my heart.

Awesome work Magellan!!!

Emoting your truth is awesome.. Improv singing, contact dance, improv movement in nature like snorkelling, dirtbiking, aikido have helped me a lot.

Keep it up!


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