I really do not know where to start but I did take other posters advice a year ago and went to therapy. That decision has changed my life even thought it was very hard. Some days I was ready to tackle the hard stuff and others not so much. There was so much that I learned but now I need to keep moving forward and keep talking about my feelings and memories that shape my life today.
My abuser was my father, brother, and cousin along with an assortment of abusive boyfriends. My father died from suicide about six years ago when he started to come clean about the abuse with me and a step sister, I truly wish there was justice. The story about my abuse is very hard to talk about due to the violence and the web of lies that followed from everyone, I was so much alone and lost.
There is much more to tell but today is much better. To be honest I am not sure how I have survived and ended up the way that I am. I have more success than failures and really have a life that most people would envy. I think that what I have done differnt is have the courage to change and do something different right or wrong. My hope is to go to one of the retreats offered on this site this year and contribute more to this blog.
At this time all I have to say is just have the courage to go one more day and do one thing different as hard as it may be.