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#459912 - 02/01/14 09:05 AM bad day
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3513
Loc: somewhere in Africa
yesterday i spent 4 hours in the dentist's chair. that would have been bad enough without the other issues. the proposed cost was a huge shock. after living in asia, this felt like a total rip-off. IF i had the money, i could fly over there, stay a few days, have the procedures done and fly back - all for less than what it costs here. and those dentists are trained in the US.

but what really got me were the triggers. my last dentist was female. this one was a BIG man. i am average to short. and i don't like the loss of control and feeling of powerlessness. and having all that stuff in my mouth and not being able to close my mouth or turn away. i was having trouble breathing and the anxiety was thick.

i tried every trick i know - slow timed breathing, naming colors of objects within view, being aware of other sensory messages and mindful of my entire body. still a hard time. i was shaky and tearful for the rest of the day and evening. today i am still a bit distracted but doing better.

SH!T - i thought i was over that...
lee


Edited by traveler (02/01/14 09:06 AM)
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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#459915 - 02/01/14 10:34 AM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2024
Loc: durham, north england
Deleted due to me realizing the last thing you need is me winjing!


Edited by dark empathy (02/01/14 10:35 AM)

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#459925 - 02/01/14 11:33 AM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3621
Loc: South-East Europe
Hey it is so good to see you here back (((Luke)))!!!
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My story

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#459926 - 02/01/14 11:40 AM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
KMCINVA Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/31/11
Posts: 1782
Sorry about feeling the triggers. You recognized them and kept them in check despite the negative feelings.

Relax and focus on the good in life.

Kevin

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#459927 - 02/01/14 11:42 AM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3621
Loc: South-East Europe
Lee, I'm glad that you went trough that visit safely.
No matter on all some situation could always be triggering as our memories are stored in bodies too.
Did you considering maybe finding female dentist like you have had it before?
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#459950 - 02/01/14 06:37 PM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
BraveFalcon Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1147
Loc: The ATL

((((Lee))))

Sorry to hear that this happened. Sometimes we are never completely over these types of things. For a lot of survivors, triggers can come out of nowhere, unexpectedly, and go through them like a buzzsaw. You say you tried every trick in the book but still had a hard time. The good news is, you had a hard time but you got through it ok anyway. You were strong, you got through it, and you're doing better today. Sometimes that's the best we can hope for. Be well. Peace,

Ken

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#459952 - 02/01/14 07:28 PM Re: bad day [Re: dark empathy]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3513
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Originally Posted By: dark empathy
Deleted due to me realizing the last thing you need is me winjing!


hey, Luke!

actually, i would be glad to hear you whinging. misery loves company, you know. and it is often helpful to know that other people get the same or similar reactions. not to feel so alone and freakish. so feel free, my friend. i wasn't really looking for advice. sometimes just having someone understand is enough.

lee


Edited by traveler (02/01/14 07:29 PM)
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


Top
#459958 - 02/01/14 07:59 PM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2024
Loc: durham, north england
@Pero thanks for the welcome, though to be honest I'm only back because I'm royally pissed off with just about everything! in the end my end just got a little bit deader.

@Lee, thanks for the thoughts.

Well I was going to say that while I'm pretty imured to medical procedures, ---- having had to endure far too many opthalmologists poking me in the eyballs and such, I have to say the dentist I saw early last year was really vial.

She was quite a young lady, but that ddn't really matter since she had none of my specific triggers, however she was anything but gentle, and absolutely pulled my face around making me feel utterly helpless and ridiculous, it was as if she was just doing a quick and rough job as speedily as possible to get in the next patient without any care for what I was feeling at, which included injecting me in the gumbs and then beginning drilling before the anaeshetic took much affect.

Quite ironicaly, I'd nearly at the same time gone to see the specialist opthalmic nurse about a shell for my damaged eyeball which involved literally gnumming and plaster moulding my eyeball, ---- particularly bad since my eyeballs are unusually sensative, (as it turned out the shell didn't work since the thing was just too painful to wear), yet the nurse was absolutely lovely, (we became quite friendly acquaintances), gave me every single instrument she'd use and even asked me if I wanted to do several of the necessary insertions onto the eye ball myself.

I can only conclude that the little shop of horrors song about dentists is true.

"son be a dentist, you have a tallent for causing pain. Son be a dentist, people will pay you to be inhumane!"

(I'll see If I can find it on youtube).

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#459959 - 02/01/14 08:05 PM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
DavoSwim Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/06/13
Posts: 336
Loc: Iowa, USA
Lee,

I can relate. I 've had a few experiences in the past few weeks that have been triggering. I can pass on some of the advice given to me, and some of the things I learned in the hopes it can help. If I remember, you gave me some advice on handling triggering situations, and I greatly appreciated it, so I'll give back to you what you gave me, because it was worthwhile.

The first thing to remember is you made it through. You may have been uncomfortable and stressed, but you made it. That shows you are a strong man and can survive the discomfort. It will also help you because now you know you can make it. There won't be any doubt that you can make it.

You did the next thing right- you took the time to slow down and breathe purposefully. That controls the levels of stress hormones and keeps you in charge. It keeps your muscles relaxed, and your heart rate low. All of this lowers the stress.

Focus and remember the successes you've had. These could be pleasant memories, positive experiences, enjoyable occasions. Keep focused on the good. Reciting a mantra may be good.

This list is small, but I hope there's something good in here. Remember, you are strong, and you'll make it through. Good luck, Lee

Dave

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#459960 - 02/01/14 08:19 PM Re: bad day [Re: traveler]
newground Offline
Chatroom Moderator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 10/11/11
Posts: 814
Loc: michigan
hey lee
I actually just had some dental work done myself... it went very surprisingly well. It was a oral surgeon, I just made the appointment and had no idea going in who it was or anything. I was really anxious as you might imagine and as it turned out the surgeon was female! frown but I had been preparing with my calming exercises I took the atavan before I got there and actually told them about my anxiety though not about the CSA. it helped that they knew this time though there have been other times when it didn't I am sorry you had a bad experience man, but don't let that convince you it will always be that way. it can be better man
Jeff
_________________________
Either I will find a way, or I will make one.
Philip Sidney

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