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#457790 - 01/02/14 02:41 AM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 422
.
_________________________
In the howling wind
Comes a stinging rain
See it driving nails
Into souls on the tree of pain
From the firefly a red orange glow
See the face of fear
Running scared in the valley below
~ Bullet The Blue Sky - U2

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#457793 - 01/02/14 02:59 AM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 422
.

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#457810 - 01/02/14 12:14 PM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3775
Loc: somewhere in Africa
are you OK, Sven?
you don't have to explain everything.
but i am concerned that you are safe.
Lee
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9



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#457811 - 01/02/14 12:22 PM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 422
.
_________________________
In the howling wind
Comes a stinging rain
See it driving nails
Into souls on the tree of pain
From the firefly a red orange glow
See the face of fear
Running scared in the valley below
~ Bullet The Blue Sky - U2

Top
#457813 - 01/02/14 12:30 PM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3775
Loc: somewhere in Africa
thanks for replying. i didn't mean to pressure you - but i have lost a couple of friends and i don't take silence lightly.

i can't tell you what you should do - but from a previous post of yours - i want to say that you do not need to feel responsible for the comfort or protection of the abusers. you owe them nothing. they used you and abused you and got what they wanted. your best choice is to do what is best for you. i hope you can find a way to find safety and protection - healing is impossible until you find that security.

take care of yourself!
Lee
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9



Top
#458396 - 01/10/14 06:11 AM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 422
So the police questioned B. after i finalised my report against him. Then they released him on tge grounds he cant leave the country cant contact met ect.
In short this is what B said to the police.

He met me when I was 17 for the first time.
I initiated the sex after we had talked briefly a few times, but because I was underage and under the influence of alcohol he said no each time.
I was mad at him for saying no to me and we didnt see eachother a few months.
Then at the end of july I found him in a bar, drunk, and i used that to my advantage ect, told him i'm legal now, whats stopping you ect and then i forced him to have sex with me in the bathroom there and later at his place.
He didnt want to see me after that but I kept coming over to his place and we ended up having sex 3 more times, the last time dec 31st.
After wich he told me we couldnt see eachother anymore, at wich i became furious and said i would tell the police that he had raped me and that he had broken my wrist. He claims he didnt know about any sexual or physical abuse by my father.

Wow. What a load of %$<##%$$^. But who will the police believe? Or more inportantly, what can be proved?

I'm not sure what to do. I'm just gah... All anxious feeling or something idk how to explain it.
_________________________
In the howling wind
Comes a stinging rain
See it driving nails
Into souls on the tree of pain
From the firefly a red orange glow
See the face of fear
Running scared in the valley below
~ Bullet The Blue Sky - U2

Top
#458415 - 01/10/14 12:54 PM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3775
Loc: somewhere in Africa
(((Sven))) -

Yeh, it is maddening to have lies told about you - especially when he makes himself look like the victim and you the abuser. I believe that time will reveal the truth.

Two good things - 1. Now he is on the "radar " of the police - they will be aware of him and his future actions will be subject to scrutiny.
2. Since he has been told not to contact you, if he does, you can report him and hopefully get enforcement. It will be important for you to follow up on this. Especially if he hurts you again or threatens to.

Remember - there are more of us on MS who believe you than whoever took his report and minght have doubts.


Edited by traveler (01/10/14 12:55 PM)
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9



Top
#458471 - 01/11/14 04:19 PM Re: So the secret is out... [Re: Sven]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 5534
Loc: O Kanada
Originally Posted By: Sven
But who will the police believe? Or more inportantly, what can be proved?


while this is relevant from a legal viewpoint (and it is good that you recognize and understand this) what it most important right now is your safety and health.
please protect your self physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically, and spiritually.
that would be my number one priority.
it is true that we all need to rely on ourselves, but it is also true that it is much more difficult to do it alone...

so please don't stop reaching out until you find the support you need.
_________________________
Victor|Victim

War
Love
Poetry

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