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#454836 - 11/22/13 08:13 PM Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday
BraveFalcon Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1043
Loc: The ATL

Triggers for both male and female survivors....

I couldn't decide whether to post this in Survivors of Female Abuse or in the Books, Films and Movies for Survivors forum, so I decided instead to post it here. I haven't seen the issue of the female abuser double standard get much discussion outside of Survivors of Female Abuse and I'm curious to see what people's opinions are when the topic is discussed amongst a broader audience. I hope that's ok....

I've been a fan of the show, "Eastbound and Down" for years now, and last Sunday they aired their final episode. The humor on the show is rude, crude, politically incorrect and generally raunchy as hell. Normally right up my ally but in the final episode, they made a "joke" that really touched a nerve in me. It wasn't even the "joke" itself that pissed me off so much, but rather the double standard it slipped by on. The old double standard that female on male sexual abuse is somehow much less serious than male on female, or male on male sexual abuse is.

I won't spend to much time setting up the scene because that would take to much explaining. Long story short, the scene involves a super rich television executive who is more or less mentoring a 13 year old boy. The twist is that he's basically showing the boy the ropes of the television industry behind the scenes. The aforementioned character is portrayed as being a total douche-bag, but that doesn't make the joke any funnier or more acceptable, nor does it negate the fact that the joke only succeeds because of the double standard it relies on.

In this scene, the characters are all backstage getting ready for a show. The television executive is asked by a very attractive woman what he wants her to do. Then, gesturing towards the boy, the TV exec hands the woman a wad of cash and says "I want you to take him in there and fuck his little dick off", referring to a closed door behind them which obviously leads to a room where he intends for the act to take place. With that, the woman grabs the alarmed-looking boy, leads him into the room, and the door closes......

BWAAAAA HAAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA!!!! OH MY GOD THAT IS SO FUCKING FUNNY!!!!! GASP.... PANT.... HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!! OH GOD MY SIDES ARE SPLITTING OPEN!!!! GASP.... KNEE SLAP.... KNEE SLAP..... HOLY CRAP, WHERE DO THEY COME UP WITH THIS STUFF?

Oh my God, you know what else would be funny? Holy crap you guys, this would be SO fucking funny! Check this out. Picture this...

What if, on the same TV show, on actual American television, they had done the same exact thing... but with a girl? What if the TV exec had handed a handsome adult male a wad of cash, gestured to a 13 year old girl and said.. "I want you to take her in there and fuck her little pussy in?" Then, that adult male had grabbed the alarmed looking girl, led her into a room behind them and closed the door?

BWAAAAA HAAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAA!!!! OH MY GOD THAT IS SO FUCKING FUNNY!!!!! GASP.... PANT.... HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!! OH GOD MY SIDES ARE SPLITTING OPEN!!!! GASP.... KNEE SLAP.... KNEE SLAP..... HOLY CRAP, WHERE DO THEY COME UP WITH THIS STUFF?

What? That's not funny, you say? That's sick and evil and disgusting and terrible and wrong? You mean you don't even think that scene would have ever made it onto TV? Not even on HBO? But why? It's funny, right? I don't get it. I'm all confused now. It was hilarious when it was a boy, why do you think people would be so outraged if it was a girl? I don't know, maybe I'm just not very bright. Maybe I just don't understand true humor. Oh well.

Anyway, I'm not officially disavowing my Eastbound and Down fandom or anything but I am disappointed that they went for a so-called "joke" that only works because of a blatant and idiotic double standard. I'm also wondering if anybody else saw it or was bothered by it like I was. Or maybe I'm completely off-base. Thoughts anyone? Peace,

Ken


Edited by BraveFalcon (11/23/13 09:15 AM)

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#454851 - 11/23/13 12:33 AM Re: Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday [Re: BraveFalcon]
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1536
Loc: New Jersey
I hear you, its a double standard and they are able to get away with it because it is the prevailing opinion. Men are supposed to be strong and able to handle ourselves and a sexual machine always looking to get laid from about 12-13 and older. Men certainly can't be victims in this society and if you don't want to have sex with a seamingly attractive women your either gay or there is something majorly wrong with you.
_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#454852 - 11/23/13 12:40 AM Re: Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday [Re: BraveFalcon]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1369
Loc: New England
Hey Ken,

Didn't see it. Never even heard of the show, but it doesn't surprise me. The sterotype of males, even at 13, being up for sex anytime, anywhere, any circumstances, with anybody, is still widely accepted. And like most stereotypes, there's a grain of truth to it. But I still resent the notion of all males as superhorndogs always ready to bang anything.

And the idea of the post-pubescent boy being initiated into sex by the older woman has the status of legend in our society. "I wish that had happened to me!" is the first thing men think when they hear about the latest female-teacher/teen-male case in the news. They don't realize that the fantasy doesn't always match the reality.

This will only change when victims start speaking out and there's an honest public discussion about male sexuality and female/male sex abuse.
_________________________
"When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown, the dream is gone
And I have become comfortably numb."
Pink Floyd

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#454862 - 11/23/13 06:35 AM Re: Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday [Re: BraveFalcon]
catfish86 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/27/09
Posts: 817
Loc: Ohio
Stacey's mom
Hot for teacher

Yes. This is our culture. It's often turned into denial and rationalization ...even the victim forced to buy the line. Until he's on his second or third marriage and a regular in rehab.
_________________________
God grant me
The Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.

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#454864 - 11/23/13 07:52 AM Re: Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday [Re: BraveFalcon]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 357
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Men are trained and brainwashed so totally to not feel, not have emotions, not show tenderness, not need gentleness, always wear a mask. Am I wrong here? Well, I'm 64 and it may be less true for younger generations, but that certainly was true where I grew up in the rural south. It was trained in the culture I grew up in that I was supposed to dream of something like the show you mentioned. I don't see a real examination of values and beliefs anywhere. An examination of values and beliefs would certainly not be supported by corporate america who depend on us being fairly easily manipulated through advertising. I haven't owned a television in 11 years, but on the rare occasions I see one in a store or restaurant, I do not see anything that represents reality that I see walking around me every day. When I rarely see any magazine, I see nothing that represents the reality in the world that I see every day. I experience an absence of critical thinking pretty much everywhere, and the trend of moving faster and faster and doing more and more only further disables ones ability to focus.

So, it doesn't surprise me. It horrifies me, but doesn't surprise me. I don't see a great deal of humans being humane in the world. People are just too busy. That the show you mentioned survived a critical review says something about popular culture that I find very disturbing.

Just my view,

Don

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#454869 - 11/23/13 10:13 AM Re: Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday [Re: BraveFalcon]
SoccerStar Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/15/12
Posts: 915
Loc: New York
Pasty older guys wish to have had a nubile twentysomething hot teacher available for them when they were teens and could go 8 times a day. No real shock.

The degree to which they have totally forgotten what it's like to actually be a young teenager - shy and insecure about their bodies, gullible and manipulated by peer pressure and shame - IS a shock.
_________________________
My story

"Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of heaven just because it hasn't!" --Bugs Bunny

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#454875 - 11/23/13 11:10 AM Re: Eastbound and Down Pissed Me Off Last Sunday [Re: BraveFalcon]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2568
My son is 13 and believe me, the mere hint of anything relating to sex and he's embarrased, uncomfortable, and trying to change the subject.

13 is NOT an age for sex.

I was a horny kid addicted to porn at 13 who had been VERY sexual since I was 5 or so... and even I KNOW I would have been afraid if an adult of any sort had sought to engage me in sexual activity at that age.

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