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#454482 - 11/19/13 07:30 PM Grandfather uncle and father
Frustrated Offline


Registered: 10/28/13
Posts: 195
Sense I started recalling all this shit a little while ago I have recalled three males in my life that sexually assaulted me. I have no idea if they even know about each other doing it. It started when I was 4 and stopped A guess as far as I guess around six. Dealing with this is a struggle. One of them is dead and the other two live across country from me and I have not seen them in 25 years. How does one deal with this
_________________________
I will never be safe I will never be sain I will always be weird inside I will always be lame

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#454486 - 11/19/13 07:49 PM Re: Grandfather uncle and father [Re: Frustrated]
flightmedic38 Offline


Registered: 09/13/13
Posts: 78
Loc: Kansas
Each one of us here deal in different ways, some write letters telling the how you feel and what there actions have caused then they burn the letter for closure. Some go as far as confronting but I would recommend professional guidance on that. My abuser took his own life last year. There is lots of support here so no matter what you decide you aren't alone.
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Either get to living or get to dying!!!!! Shawshank redemption

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#454513 - 11/19/13 10:02 PM Re: Grandfather uncle and father [Re: Frustrated]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 947
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Hi Frustrated,

Whatever you do, do it very, very slowly. Your stuff will just naturally come up as you are ready for it. Airing and discussing here is a great place to sort things out. I'm 64, and didn't begin to remember my father's sexual abuse until age 53, and didn't begin to remember my mother's sexual abuse until this year. Be very, very gentle with yourself. I think LOTS of discussion here is a great way to get your directional signals in order. Wishing you smooth sailing.

Don
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Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

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#454526 - 11/20/13 12:07 AM Re: Grandfather uncle and father [Re: Frustrated]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3705
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Frustrated -

it is devastating to get those certain memories.

and it is even worse when it is family members who were the abusers. they are the ones who should be most trustworthy, who should be protecting you, who should have your best interests at heart.

you deserve to feel bad about it, grieve the knowledge of the tragedy and the trauma, and to let the poison out. write, chat, vent, whatever you can to process and communicate your hurt and anger. if you can get support from a T - by all means,go for it.

just dont give up.
LEE
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"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself... And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity." - Paulo Coelho


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#454527 - 11/20/13 12:25 AM Re: Grandfather uncle and father [Re: Frustrated]
Frustrated Offline


Registered: 10/28/13
Posts: 195
Still processing it all. Idk how to feel any more just num. wish I could just forget it all. Anger is about all I can feel
_________________________
I will never be safe I will never be sain I will always be weird inside I will always be lame

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