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#453468 - 11/13/13 06:42 AM Anxiety
Frustrated Offline


Registered: 10/28/13
Posts: 157
How do you deal with this anxiety? I didn't have anxiety any more than the next guy before all this started. Now my anxiety is through the roof. How the hell do you deal with this on top of everything else. I hate this shit. Any good ideas??
_________________________
I will never be fixed I will never be whole I will never be okay I will never give up

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#453469 - 11/13/13 07:12 AM Re: Anxiety [Re: Frustrated]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 358
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Hi Frustrated,

I'm going through intense anxiety, also. It is so frustrating for me because I watch myself angst over old, old issues where my old, old patterns really get me into trouble, and I do not seem to be able to make any headway. I don't have to make any decisions right now, but old patterns are urging me to become engaged in a situation which I feel would be unhealthy for me, a situation where I will get shredded by people who are interested only in power and control over others and not interested in music, which is a love of mine. I have become involved twice previously over the past four years in the music program at a little church I attend. Each time, the "power and control module" as I call them have been unable to even hear any recommendations I have made. There inability to hear any voice other than their own has always resulted in enormous stress coming my way. So, in reality the only thing I have done is to enable a broke system. I pray this time I have the good sense to just stay out of it and let nature take its course.

This situation makes me crazy, and inspires me to re-engage in old destructive patterns. I do not want to do that. I do not intend to do that. It is so easy to get hooked, though. Everything about this triggers me. Music is an incredible passion to me(singing and playing piano) and has been blocked this whole lifetime because of my abuse issues. There is an old saying 'in order to see the way, you have to clear the way.' I know I need to clear out some of this old shit, but I have such internal resistance to doing so. I know it goes back to early abuse from my parents and a belief that if I did not keep engaged in the abusive situation I would either die from neglect or be killed by them. Neither of those things have been true for at least 46 years, but the old beliefs are powerful. I am going to do my best to hunker down for the next several days and try to just walk through this old stuff.

The only good idea I have is that timely retreat seems to be a good idea. Moving out into the world during high anxiety is asking for trouble. I wish you and me well Frustrated.

Don

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#453471 - 11/13/13 07:27 AM Re: Anxiety [Re: Frustrated]
Frustrated Offline


Registered: 10/28/13
Posts: 157
Don
I hear you. You like me have deep seated issues that can cause harm if allowed to. Controlling the uncontrolabe a paradox in my universe. I'm not sure but I think most sca victim relate to music in deeper way than nonvictims. Music is a reality an escape a motivator a joy but can destroy me as well. I do withdraw when I am anxious and that helps. Thanks

James
_________________________
I will never be fixed I will never be whole I will never be okay I will never give up

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#453505 - 11/13/13 02:20 PM Re: Anxiety [Re: Frustrated]
traveler Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3198
Loc: back in the USA
a number of things can help with anxiety:

exercise - even as simple as vigorous walking

listening to music

writing - journaling or poetry or fantasy fiction or... you can even delete it or destroy it once you are done if you don't want it read by others.

controlled, timed, deep breathing

art - drawing, painting, clay

chopping wood or digging a hole or raking leaves

a change of scene - go outside or drive to a nearby park or another town or the beach or the woods or the mountains

talk to someone if there is someone safe and accessible

sing in the shower

play a musical instrument

clean out the garage or basement or closet

meditate



some of these tactics i can make work for me - others not. some are meant to handle the anxiety and put it into perspective - and others to distract you from it and displace it with another focus. try some different things and see what works for you. you may be able to find something completely your own.

LEE
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9

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