yeah, Chris -
dealing with it on our own doesn't work - and neither does forgetting - in the long run - as you have learned. and the confusion is perfectly understandable - a normal response to an abnormal situation.
and far from being alone - there are thousands of us in this same boat with you. welcome.
let us know how we can help.
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago