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#450527 - 10/18/13 04:33 AM Talking Dog
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3323
Loc: O Kanada
Talking Dog




A man sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog for Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. He goes into the backyard and sees a black mutt just sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the mutt replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The mutt looks up and says, "Well, I discovered this gift pretty young and I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping."

"I was one of their most valuable spies eight years running. But, the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger and I wanted to settle down."

"So, I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security work, mostly wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings there and was awarded a batch of medals."

"Had a wife, a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."


The man is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

The owner says, "Ten dollars."

The guy says, "This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

The owner replies, "He's such a liar. He didn't do any of that stuff."
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#450707 - 10/20/13 05:50 AM Re: Talking Dog [Re: victor-victim]
Brian Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 05/03/01
Posts: 1563
Loc: Upstate NY
smile I like that one!
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#450736 - 10/21/13 04:21 AM Re: Talking Dog [Re: Brian]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3323
Loc: O Kanada
A dog walks into a bar and hops up on a stool. He looks the bartender in the eye and says, "Hey, guess what? I can talk. Have you ever seen a talking dog before? How about a drink?"

The bartender thinks for a moment and says, "Sure, the toilet's right around the corner."
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#450779 - 10/21/13 10:01 AM Re: Talking Dog [Re: victor-victim]
Banjo596 Offline


Registered: 08/20/13
Posts: 42
Loc: Ohio
lol ^^
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#450837 - 10/21/13 03:37 PM Re: Talking Dog [Re: victor-victim]
SamV Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5942
Loc: Talladega, Alabama, USA
lol lol laugh
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#450907 - 10/21/13 11:29 PM Re: Talking Dog [Re: SamV]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3323
Loc: O Kanada
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#450909 - 10/21/13 11:32 PM Re: Talking Dog [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3323
Loc: O Kanada
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#450910 - 10/21/13 11:34 PM Re: Talking Dog [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3323
Loc: O Kanada
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#450931 - 10/22/13 05:13 AM Re: Talking Dog [Re: victor-victim]
Bluedogone Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/03/13
Posts: 189
Loc: Southeast US
A dog walks into a bar and hops up on a stool next to an elderly man.

He turns to the man and says, "Hey, I'm a talking dog, I have magic powers. All you have to do is order me a drink, snap your fingers and a beautiful girl will appear on each side of you right here at the bar."

The man grabbed the dog and hurried out of the bar with him. The dog said, "Hey man, didn't you hear me? All you had to do was order me a drink, snap your fingers and you would have had a beautiful girl on either side of you."

The man said, "No. At my age I think I'd rather have a talking dog."
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