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#450819 - 10/21/13 02:32 PM I'm new
huon Offline

Registered: 09/17/13
Posts: 6
Have read some threads here and think this is a good place to be. I feel like I am trying to put a puzzle together, but I don't have all the pieces yet. I have a few memories of my csa, but not a lot. I want to put the pieces together but am having a hard time figuring out how to go about it. Anyway, just saying Hi.

#450820 - 10/21/13 02:35 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
Obi Offline

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1396
Loc: kansas
welcome to ms.
live another day. climb a little higher.

my story

my vlog

#450838 - 10/21/13 03:39 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
Jay1946 Offline

Registered: 08/08/13
Posts: 99
Loc: Miami, Florida, USA
"I feel like I am trying to put a puzzle together, but I don't have all the pieces yet"

That's exactly how I felt when I started this journey. There were things in my life I just couldn't explain. When I recollected my csa, some of the pieces that were missing from the puzzle of my life started to fall into place.

I still haven't completed the puzzle...lots missing... but at least I feel like I've started to find a rational explanation out for behaviors that previously seemed so irrational.

Best of luck in your journey.

#450840 - 10/21/13 04:04 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
Zero Offline

Registered: 09/24/13
Posts: 35
Loc: Tennessee
Welcome to Malesurvivor,

There are certain details of my CSA that I can't remember as well, know you are not alone. I think in time most repressed memories reveal themselves but I am not an expert on this topic.

#450844 - 10/21/13 04:55 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
Dave PNW Offline

Registered: 04/03/13
Posts: 121
Loc: Pacific Northwest
Welcome to MS huon. I am sorry you have to deal with csa issues from your past. You have found a good supportive community to help you on your path. A lot of us here know what its like to have just scraps and disjointed pieces of our story. I have worked alot over the last year through writing and meditation practice to put my story together. Travel at your own pace. Over the six months I have been here I have been helped greatly. Welcome.

#450846 - 10/21/13 05:16 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
victor-victim Offline

Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3546
Loc: O Kanada
welcome to

hope you find hope, help, healing and happiness.
here and everywhere in your life.

when it comes to jigsaw puzzles,
it always helps to step back once in a while,
and take a good long look at the big picture.

especially when i don't have the box it came with to show me what it's supposed to look like.

but there's joy in the challenge, i find.
i get great satisfaction whenever i make a solid connection and
i know it's worth it.

discovering one's self is a privilege and a pleasure,
but it can be a painful process.
perhaps the perils and pitfalls of passion and pride can periodically prevent progress,
but patience and persistence pay off.
the purpose is personal power.
the prize is pure inner peace.
move at your own pace,
or remain in one place.

please play fair, and protect your privacy.

it is my wish that you find what you seek.


#450883 - 10/21/13 09:01 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
traveler Offline

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3513
Loc: somewhere in Africa
huon - welcome!

take it easy and don't try to force things. reading is good - but not too much at once. self-reflective writing may help. take your time and be kind and gentle with yourself.

As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago

#450894 - 10/21/13 10:14 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]

Registered: 08/31/11
Posts: 1782

Healing is a puzzle--it takes time to put the pieces together and they do not always fit at first. Take your time and move at your own pace-because healing takes time and support--and we are here for you.

Heal well and remember we are here for you.


#450895 - 10/21/13 10:15 PM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
Bill61 Offline

Registered: 09/29/13
Posts: 41
Loc: Illinois
I'm new with this site as well and I also just came home from a weekend of recovery. I learned that there were 25 other guys who were abused to and each one felt the same way. On Saturday October 19th, I was able to tell my story to 6 people in my small group and felt I lost 100lbs.

On Sunday, we all told each other what we are leaving and what we are taking away. Mine was that I was leaving my past and I'm taking: live moment to moment.

Small Stones
"Those who remove mountains begin by carrying away small stones"

"I am in charge of how I fell and I choose HAPPINESS" from The Law of Attraction.

#451147 - 10/24/13 12:54 AM Re: I'm new [Re: huon]
Jude Offline

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1600
Loc: New England
Welcome huon,

You've come to a good place to put the peices together. Its a hard road, and there will be pain, but the payoff is getting back your life.

Be well,

Seems I've got to have a change of scene
Every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it could have been
Left here on my own or so it seems
I've got to leave before I start to scream
Joe Cocker

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