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#448020 - 09/23/13 05:34 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
newground Offline
Chatroom Moderator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 10/11/11
Posts: 761
Loc: michigan
hey sven be proud of that man! you took what action you could this far and that is GREAT!!! you may have saved some and who knows you may yet be rescued yourself. you are in my thoughts so often man wishing you the best
Jeff
_________________________
Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee. let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!"
Herman Melville

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#448022 - 09/23/13 05:45 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Smalltown80sBoy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/25/12
Posts: 2217
Originally Posted By: Sven
'what if i just stepped infront of that bus or take a bunch of pills' it would be so much easier. Don't worry im not planning on doing anything dumb but sometimes everything feels so pointless. sorry.


Don't be sorry. You say you're not planning on doing anything but if you ever think you might, then maybe you should consider calling a crisis hotline.

Here's one.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

1-800-273-8255

Keep talking. We've all been there. Maybe not in your exact situation, but we know what it's like to be violated like that.

By the way, I've been to hell so many times that if there were frequent traveler points, I'd have enough to travel around the world.

Hell is a horrible place. It's so painful and it feels like there is no way out. But you've managed to make it this long and that shows what an incredible survivor you are.

Please take care.

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#448031 - 09/23/13 08:54 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
pittsburgh Offline


Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 89
Loc: west Chester, Pa
The fact that you are reaching out shows progress, continue to reach out to men on hear, read books. I like Mike Lews "Victims no Longer". If not in therapy find one. One who has worked with male survivors. I have found that all of these things have really helped. God's speed, things can and will get better with willingness, work, My best to you.
_________________________
it is and has been quite a trip thru life, as last I feel that I am in a better place, it takes work and in my case a wife the was and is forgiveing and helpful. At last a relationship has gone right, messed up three.

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#448045 - 09/23/13 11:08 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
justplainme Offline


Registered: 09/01/09
Posts: 297
we all are here for you.
_________________________

"Survivors need an opportunity to define their own sexuality in their own terms, rather than in reaction to the abuse, so that they stop allowing their offenders to have power over them sexually."

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#448116 - 09/24/13 06:30 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 278
I just have those idk... waves of depression I guess. They come and go but I'm not sure how to deal with them. I just pretend I'm ok.

That link you posted smalltownboy is only for the usa, i'm not from the USA. I actually googled and couldnt really find anything usefull that allows people to use their chat if they dont live in the usa/uk/australia etc. Well there are a couple of Dutch ones with limited opening hours. But I don't really like the idea of one on one chats with volunteers or professionals anyways.
But yeh it's fine i'm not planning on doing anything dumb anyways, as I said. Though i'm not sure i'd mind either if something happened.
_________________________
In the howling wind
Comes a stinging rain
See it driving nails
Into souls on the tree of pain
From the firefly a red orange glow
See the face of fear
Running scared in the valley below
~ Bullet The Blue Sky - U2

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#448167 - 09/25/13 04:53 AM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Onesimus75 Offline


Registered: 08/22/13
Posts: 158
Loc: Minnesota
We'd mind. Stay well, please. Keep surviving!
_________________________
We are not defined by our faults, or our wounds, but by the truth within us, which nothing can take away.

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#448194 - 09/25/13 10:34 AM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Rich1967 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/17/13
Posts: 270
Loc: PA
Sven,

Sometimes the help we need isn't comfortable, but the pain for the gain can be worth it. Just something to think about.

You said: [I just pretend I'm ok.]

I think it's a very AA thing to say, "Fake it till you make it". It's a perfectly valid way of coping and when you can do it well it's something to be proud of.

Do you have AA and AL Anon meetings in your area? You may want to go to them. You may find people there who have better ideas of how you can find the support you need in your area. Somebody may have already suggested this, but it just was a thought that popped into my head.

Keep looking for help. I keep praying that you will find it.
_________________________
Rich

"Me too" - I don't think I will ever get tired of saying or hearing these two words.

My Story:
http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=441625#Post441625

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#448215 - 09/25/13 04:50 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Sven Offline


Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 278
i dont really want to talk in reallife. I'm sorry. Also i dont have a drinking problem..
_________________________
In the howling wind
Comes a stinging rain
See it driving nails
Into souls on the tree of pain
From the firefly a red orange glow
See the face of fear
Running scared in the valley below
~ Bullet The Blue Sky - U2

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#448217 - 09/25/13 05:00 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Rich1967 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/17/13
Posts: 270
Loc: PA
You don't have to be sorry! Glad you don't have a drinking problem too :-) Was just thinking out loud when I typed that.

Take care.
_________________________
Rich

"Me too" - I don't think I will ever get tired of saying or hearing these two words.

My Story:
http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=441625#Post441625

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#448225 - 09/25/13 06:03 PM Re: Everything going to hell *triggers* [Re: Sven]
Smalltown80sBoy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/25/12
Posts: 2217
Here's a link for international crisis resources. I got this from the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline so it should be legit.

International Association for Suicide Prevention

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