Around 12 months ago after 40 or so years of dissociation I started on my journey of healing, after a couple of very painful months my wife had a breakdown and I was forced to shovel all of the s**t back inside my head, throw it into the room that I'd made a long time ago and relock the door, thankfully she's now recovering well and I feel that I'm able to start again, the trouble is I can't get past first base.
Its like how I was before I decided to take the journey and I really don't know what to do, its like I can't even find the door anymore and its scaring me.
To look up and not down,
To look forward and not back,
To look out and not in