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#444929 - 08/21/13 12:17 PM Doctor Visit
DavoSwim Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/06/13
Posts: 336
Loc: Iowa, USA
Hey,

I had a doctor's appointment this morning. A few months ago I had told him that I had experienced CSA while growing up. At that time, his response was, in my opinion, rather uncaring. I was upset with him and thought about finding a new doctor.

I just mentioned to him today that I was seeing a T for childhood sex abuse issues. His response was "I am so sorry that you experienced that growing up." That one sentence made all the difference. I didn't need to go into anymore depth about what was going on. I really felt he was on my side with all my health problems, and I'm glad I didn't just find another doctor.

DavO

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#444935 - 08/21/13 01:27 PM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
Suwanee Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 759
Loc: Southeast USA
Dave,

I remember when you encountered this back in the spring. I was hoping your doctor was distracted or just having a bad day. That seems to be the case...it's amazing what a few understanding words will do. I'm glad you got to hear them.

Will
_________________________
Cruel Summer
My Journal

-Signs and traces left in stone
Ruins of a past unknown-

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#445011 - 08/21/13 09:26 PM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
ThisMan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/13
Posts: 767
Loc: upper south
That is great, Dave. Validation by someone as important as our care giver gives tremendous credence to our issues. I am glad you told him again and glad he shared his words.

bill
_________________________
For now we see through a glass, darkly.



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#445015 - 08/21/13 09:59 PM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
BraveFalcon Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1147
Loc: The ATL

Hi Dave. I remember the thread you're talking about. I'm glad to hear that the situation was more or less rectified and that the doctor in question had a chance to redeem himself. Hope the rest of the visit went well to. smile Peace,

Ken

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#445025 - 08/21/13 10:36 PM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1600
Loc: New England
Originally Posted By: DavoSwim
....His response was "I am so sorry that you experienced that growing up."
Oddly enough, my PCP said almost exactly the same thing to me. Maybe they took the same class.

Jude
_________________________
Seems I've got to have a change of scene
Every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it could have been
Left here on my own or so it seems
I've got to leave before I start to scream
Joe Cocker

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#445092 - 08/22/13 10:42 AM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
toddop Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/14/11
Posts: 226
Loc: California
Dave,

I am glad to hear that you had a better experience with your doctor. I hate doctors due to a really bad experience as a kid. I have always kept them at arm's length because I generally find they are really tuned out to anything other than the physical. When you find one that responds with sympathy and kindness to an issue like CSA that is also psychological and emotional, it is golden.
_________________________
Todd

"Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds."
-Albert Einstein

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#445124 - 08/22/13 04:02 PM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
Rich1967 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/17/13
Posts: 289
Loc: PA
Good news Dave.

I never thought about it much. I told my doc and he didn't seem to know what to say. From his expression I guess he knows it's a big deal, but just didn't know what to say. I went because I was having...um...performance issues and told him I thought maybe this was psychological in nature because of my CSA (which I think it is). He went right to testosterone levels and gave me a script for Viagra. Oh well, I thought some people just don't get it. He's a nice guy and always says to say hi to my wife, but very much just a physical stuff only doctor.

Maybe I should think about switching?
_________________________
Rich

"Me too" - I don't think I will ever get tired of saying or hearing these two words.

My Story:
http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=441625#Post441625

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#445146 - 08/22/13 05:36 PM Re: Doctor Visit [Re: DavoSwim]
Publius Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/13/12
Posts: 425
Loc: OH
"From his expression I guess he knows it's a big deal, but just didn't know what to say."

In my experience this is case with most disclosures to non-survivors. They know how they are supposed to react, they genuinely believe what was done to us was heinous, but they simply do not know what to say or do. My own doctor suggested I "bury it because this is something that can really hold you back," which really just made me wonder what he had to bury in order to become a doctor. All in all he probably genuinely means what he said to you but he likely has no idea just how meaningful hearing that is for a survivor.
_________________________
"Life is like this dark tunnel. You may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place." ~ General Iroh

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