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#442916 - 08/01/13 04:21 PM advice on using public restrooms
Hailzes Offline


Registered: 01/21/11
Posts: 25
Loc: 161
Of late there have been horrendous stories in our news (uk), about children being assaulted whilst using public bathrooms (today in a KFC in Scotland, and last year in a Debenhams). Being a mother to an almost 5 yo, he obviously still uses the ladies with me; my question is about the future. I want to ask "what age is a safe age" but obviously we know there IS no "safe" age, anyone can be assaulted regardless of age/strength etc, so what do I do? What do YOU do?
Would me stalking outside act as a deterrent? Do I just tell him straight "I'm scared an evil person could harm you"? It's hard to know what to do for the best.
Thanks in advance community.

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#442918 - 08/01/13 04:42 PM Re: advice on using public restrooms [Re: Hailzes]
Jacob S Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/01/13
Posts: 594
I don't have kids, but I did find this article. Hope it helps.

Quote:
Children need to know that they have the right to keep their own body safe – that other grown-ups aren’t allowed to touch them – and the child needs to know who their safe people are to talk to,” says Gallagher, who directs a family and child care program at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.

Kids should be taught that “in the real world there are some unhappy grown-ups who don’t do nice things to other people,” she says, learning to be cautious and aware, not fearful.

http://www.spokesman.com/stories/2010/jul/26/fears-about-stranger-danger/
_________________________
Like a spent gladiator
crawling in the colosseum dust
who can count on his remaining limbs
all the people he can trust.
Like the one who stands behind him
cheering him on
Estatic when he stands defiant,
wild with abandon when he's gone

just stay alive.
do whatever you need to.
you are worth it.

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#442920 - 08/01/13 04:50 PM Re: advice on using public restrooms [Re: Hailzes]
Breakenridge Offline


Registered: 03/25/13
Posts: 6
Loc: USA
Hi Hailzes,

We all here appreciate your concern for your son's safety, however, your son is statistically more likely to be assulted by someone he knows or in his own family than someone in a public restroom. Hope that fact will calm your fears.

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#442930 - 08/01/13 06:04 PM Re: advice on using public restrooms [Re: Hailzes]
Hailzes Offline


Registered: 01/21/11
Posts: 25
Loc: 161
Thank you both for your responses. I think the news has been frightening me out of my wits x

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#443195 - 08/04/13 12:56 AM Re: advice on using public restrooms [Re: Hailzes]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3378
Loc: somewhere in Africa
As a survivor myself - I worried about this with my own 3 kids. We taught them to say such things as "you are not my dad (or mom)." And "don't touch me." And to speak really loudly and call for the parent who was waiting outside. We even practiced at home - as if it were a play. The last thing a perp wants is to attract attention.

lee


Edited by traveler (08/04/13 12:57 AM)
Edit Reason: sp
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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#444844 - 08/20/13 07:24 PM Re: advice on using public restrooms [Re: Hailzes]
king tut Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/13/08
Posts: 2466
Loc: UK
If I remember right the Debenhams wasn't a straight forward assault in a toilets- the kid was grabbed and marched through a crowded high street and then taken to the toilets in Debenhams.

I agree with the other advice here, and agree that although it is good to be aware it shouldn't be something to worry yourself about too much as it does seem rare. And giving advice to your son if somebody does approach him is good!
_________________________
"...until lambs become lions"

I love you, little lewis, and i will never leave you. We are the same. You brighten my day, and i will make sure that i brighten yours. Hugs and kisses.


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