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#44273 - 02/05/06 12:26 AM is it ok to fire my therapist?
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
we just dont agree on anything it seems ,she tries to tell me how i should feel about things that happened to me but wont listen if i tell her thats not how i feel ,example ,she says that being kept in the closet was the worst thing he did to me ,and that is what is causing me problems now ,that being isolated for long periods of time has made me with draw into myself.ok sounds kind reasonable i guess ,but when i tell her that the closet was my safe place and that i wanted to be there ,she says impossible i'm just in denial? does it make sense that when i was locked in there i knew at least for a while that he wouldn't be sexualy abusing me or beating me ? and if he kept me there for 3 or 4 days that was 3 or 4 days without abuse,i could at least stop bleeding in that time ,i would watch the crack of light under the door for his feet praying that door wouldn't open ,but it always did.and the light was so bright i couldn't see him reaching for me , sorry doc but i never wanted out of that closet ,it aint the problem .i think i'm gonna get a new t. do you think she is right? thanks shadow

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#44274 - 02/05/06 12:29 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
Dewey2k Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/22/05
Posts: 3069
You have every right to fire her. It's YOUR recovery, and if she isn't helping you, then find someone who is! It is YOUR feelings that should be worked with, not HER feelings about what she THINKS you SHOULD be feeling.

As an aside, is she a survivor herself?


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#44275 - 02/05/06 12:47 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
shadowkid Offline
WARNING from ModTeam, September 2013: user "Shadowkid" was exposed as a hoaxer. His entire online persona and stories of sexual abuse were fiction. We encourage you not to become emotionally concerned by anything you see in any of his posts. Thank you
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/18/05
Posts: 2437
no she is not

_________________________
its not hard to fall
when you float like a cannonball - damien rice

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#44276 - 02/05/06 01:03 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
Andrew Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/25/03
Posts: 1192
Of course you can fire her Shadow. Don't give up on therapists, you'll find a good one. Peace, Andrew

_________________________
there is no courage without anxiety

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#44277 - 02/05/06 03:55 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
johnsurvived Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/20/05
Posts: 332
Loc: Arlington, Virginia
Shadow,

She doesn't exactly sound like the brightest bulb in the pack. Start shopping for her replacement. Therapeutic 'styles' differ from T to T, but no therapist should be trying to tell you how to feel, or that you're "in denial." That's abusive, and you shouldn't have to suffer more than you already have, and certainly not from your T of all people in the world.

John

_________________________
Take for us the foxes, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards; for our vines have tender grapes. Song of Solomon 2:15

But let justice roll down as waters, and righteousness as a mighty stream. Amos 5:24

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#44278 - 02/05/06 04:02 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1536
Loc: New Jersey
Yes, you have every right to fire a therapist. I just started with a new therapist, I'm not sure if I like the way he's taking our sessions, so my defenses are up and I'll be firing him if I feel it isn't working out.

_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#44279 - 02/05/06 04:13 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
OKIE MIKE Offline
Member

Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 979
Loc: HULBERT OK
Ofcourse it is allright to fire Your "t" because id they are not doing you any bood what is the point . There job is to listen to You and try and help . If they wont do that what is the piont of waisting your time .

_________________________
MICHAEL

"I HAD NO SHOES THEN I SAW A MAN THAT HAD NO FEET"

"All I can do is be me, whoever that is"

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#44280 - 02/05/06 05:10 AM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
TJ jeff Offline

Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3354
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
Hi Shadow,

I know we talked about this a bit last night - but I (after remembering what was said last night and reading what you wrote here) would most definately try to find a difrent therapist

What you wrote about feeling safer in the closet makes 110% perfect sense to me - I would gladly trade the abuse for isolation any day of the week - I had safe places too - I used to go hide under the bed - or wrap myself up tightly in the sheets - and I even used to hide in the huge toy bin that was in my closet

remember from last night... - your feelings are YOUR feelings - don't let anyone tell you what to feel

Take good care of you,

TJ jeff

_________________________
Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher

Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken...

TJ's History

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#44281 - 02/05/06 12:41 PM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
Adam,

she is telling you what to think.
She should be exploring your feelings, not invalidating them.

The closet would have felt safe, she should never deny that to you.

I dont know how long you have been seeing her, maybe you give her more time, but it is up to you to fire her if she continues on the same path,

ste

_________________________
Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

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#44282 - 02/05/06 12:42 PM Re: is it ok to fire my therapist?
reality2k4 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6838
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
duplicated post

_________________________
Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

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