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#441569 - 07/21/13 03:36 AM triggered
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3602
Loc: O Kanada
can't even sit with my family and watch a family movie on television without being triggered.
stupid show has this flirting relationship with sexual undertones between a teenage boy and his buddy's mom that is supposed to funny.
he is helping her with the garden, and they are teasing each other.
the sexual tension is obvious.
it is making me sick, but i don't want to say anything to ruin the show for everyone else, so here i am furiously typing away in the corner, trying to avoid listening to this garbage while pretending to still be here.
at least i can make conversation with them during the commercial breaks. i love my family, but their taste in tv sucks.

sorry had to get that out of my system.
feel better now.
thanks for being there ms.org wink


oh oh.
now the boy and the woman are dancing romantically.
and she is talking about cougars and milf's.
this is making me sick again.

i may have to leave the room.

this is really creepy.

ok, so now the friend/son just walked in on them and it is all awkward and my family is laughing.
at least they are having a good time.
this is a family comedy?
i am not amused.

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#441595 - 07/21/13 10:10 AM Re: triggered [Re: victor-victim]
concerned_husky Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/29/12
Posts: 610
*Shudders*

This reminds me of a time when I happened to bring up child abuse with a so-called 'friend' (who I've cut off all contacts with now) - he just let out a huge roar of laughter when I did. I guess this stuff is funny to some people.
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#441597 - 07/21/13 10:17 AM Re: triggered [Re: victor-victim]
BraveFalcon Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/25/13
Posts: 1147
Loc: The ATL

Hi VV. Needless to say, things like this trigger me as well. I've even been triggered in this way by a couple of shows that I really like. I try to let it roll off and tell myself "it's just a joke" but it's a joke I can't find funny. I know I sound like a broken record on this particular issue sometimes, but it wouldn't piss me off nearly as much if it weren't for the double standard. Ie, if a prime-time network family show portrayed a young girl and a grown man as having some kind of covert sexual interest in one another, it would never fly. There would be a big deal made out of it and people would be demanding that the episode be pulled or even that the show be canceled. When it's a boy and a woman.... HA HA! No big deal, right? It's all cute and funny.

The one example that I can think of where the same situation involved a girl and a man was the movie, American Beauty, but that was a rated R movie and the relationship in question was portrayed as being fucked-up, not cute and funny. Sadly, I don't see this double standard ever changing but oh well. It is what it is. Sorry you had to deal with this recently. Sorry that any of us ever do. Peace,


Ken

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#441676 - 07/22/13 12:19 AM Re: triggered [Re: victor-victim]
victor-victim Offline


Registered: 09/27/03
Posts: 3602
Loc: O Kanada
you are so right about the gender bias, BraveFalcon.
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#441732 - 07/22/13 11:02 AM Re: triggered [Re: victor-victim]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2024
Loc: durham, north england
@Falcon, what you said about "shows you really like" reminded me of something that I saw myself.

I generally speaking really ejoy The Simpsons (albeit current series are going off quite a bit), with the social comedy and satire, however there was one scene that really bothered me.

It was about homer and marge (who are, if you don't watch the program the principle mum and dad of the simpso family), reliving an incident from Homer's past where he went to a summer camp as a ten year old and met a ten year old marge.

The stuff betwene homer and marge was fine, --- they met, talked very awkwardly and shared a kiss, ---- okay, a little sappy but I can live with it. Later in the episode however, Homer runs to find Marge who has already left. He meeets marge's sister patty who perminantly hates Homer in the series as an adultk, who gleefully informs him marge left because he never came back as they'd previous arranged, and she hates him. He exclaims

"but we kissed" to which patty, ---- at this point about telve, replies, "that's not special" and proceeds to grab homer's face and forceably give him an obviously adult kiss.

Just to be clear, this is a twelve year old girl, violently forcing adult, overtly s/xual stuff on a 10 year old boy, a boy who is morever saying a muffled "no!" and struggling to get out of her grip.

Yes, it's a cartoon, but my god, what were the writers thinking? oh yar, I know what they were thinking, when a girl does it to a boy it's funny, since after all young girls don't do those sorts of things.

To understand this kind of blindspot look at reactions to the film kick ass,an admittedly dark take on the super hero genre.

In it, "hit girl" is a violent, boarderline psychotic girl who knives, shoots and generally brutalizes her way through many mafia bad guys while swearing and cursing. Yet, the thing that people got up in arms about is that she was a twelve year old girl doing this! indeed the producers wanted to change her gender as if a boy doing the same things would be more acceptabl.

In fairness there's nothing s/xual about kick ass, it's a film about exactly how much nastiness and violence and inherent stupidity there is under the idea of squeaky clean super heroes, so the violence serves a point, however what it says about cultural perceptions about young girls, ---- especially that the same film features 14 year old boys doing equally brutal things and nobody bats an eye lid.

Btw, there are seens in kick ass that some people might find triggering, so I don't recommend watching it unless your okay on violence, --- it isn't intended as nice or feel good but satire in it's purist sense, ---- like the scene when the mafia broardcast a video of people trying to be Superheroes being tortured onto youtube and in a school canteen people are desperately trying to "unlike" that video so that others won't think them sick, --- despite the fact of what is actually being scene.

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