I have to laugh at the odd twists life gives me sometimes because I just had some of the best chats I've had in a while and it's nearly 5am...so it's put all of my thoughts on addiction in a new light now.
In light of that, I guess - with chatting, at least - what you said was most paramount:
everything in moderation, including moderation.
So...basically, I shouldn't quit chatting entirely, but simply choose the times I chat and stick to it. And once in a while, overthrow the moderation for a full marathon in the hopes of catching yet another deep conversation...
the problem is, i can't express my true feelings around her or the kids.
I think that captures quite well why many of us keep coming back here.