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#439217 - 06/25/13 10:42 PM Thankful for a moment of peace
nolan79 Offline


Registered: 06/22/13
Posts: 32
Loc: sc, united states
It feels good to have a moment of peace. A moment where you are not having sexual images, or flashbacks. For the last 2 days I have had the hardest time. Every time I look at another male I'd have a sexual thought about him. It was so hard to stay in the moment; to not retreat within myself and go on autopilot. What autopilot is for me, is when the stress gets so intense that I no longer feel I am in control. When those moments come, I know I am responding to people, but it feels like its coming from another place, another person. I hate feeling that way because I can literally feel my body shaking in the inside, and at any moment I will start to run or scream. Since joining this site, which was about a day or so ago, I have noticed that I am gaining more control with every post I make, and with every message I receive. It really feels great to know you are not alone with your thoughts and actions. It feels good to know that your actions are coming from a real place, a place of hurt, but that they are shared by others. I am really thankful for the guys who have messaged me, and shared their stories, as well as listened to mine. I have a very long road to recovery, but as long as I am able to express those things inside of me, I won't burst.
_________________________
Every hidden secret will eventually find light

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#439219 - 06/25/13 10:58 PM Re: Thankful for a moment of peace [Re: nolan79]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1390
Hey Nolan -

Welcome. This place can be a tremendous pressure relief valve. I can only guess that each and every person here has at one time thought they were the only one in the whole world experiencing this shame. When I was twelve, I didn't even tell my diary what my molester was doing to me. I would have never guessed finding an entire world of survivors who would say those incredible magic words... Me, too.
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Eirik




Click my pic to see why I'm here

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#439221 - 06/25/13 11:10 PM Re: Thankful for a moment of peace [Re: Chase Eric]
nolan79 Offline


Registered: 06/22/13
Posts: 32
Loc: sc, united states
I totally agree with you!

Originally Posted By: Chase Eric
Hey Nolan -

Welcome. This place can be a tremendous pressure relief valve. I can only guess that each and every person here has at one time thought they were the only one in the whole world experiencing this shame. When I was twelve, I didn't even tell my diary what my molester was doing to me. I would have never guessed finding an entire world of survivors who would say those incredible magic words... Me, too.
_________________________
Every hidden secret will eventually find light

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#439227 - 06/26/13 12:00 AM Re: Thankful for a moment of peace [Re: nolan79]
Castle Offline


Registered: 10/03/09
Posts: 731
Loc: NJ
don't forget to breathe... it's really important.
_________________________

My posts can self destruct at any time..read them while you can.

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