I have this horrible habit with men (and less so with women) of ranking people. Is so and so better than me or worse than me. More of a mess? Less aware? Are they more handsome? More confident? More accomplished? More fake? More depraved?
I'm right there with you GS.....a recovering "comparison maker". All of the above, and more (I won't even go into the showers at the gym anymore), but I'm getting better at it. I don't have to be the best, richest, smartest, sexiest, whateverest. I am just another "Bozo on the bus" as they say in AA. And thats enough for me.
"But now old friends are acting strange,
they shake their heads, they say I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day
....it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all. "Joni Mitchell