Good post forgive777. Sex is a difficult issue for most of us. I noticed that you have kept the date of your last encounter with a woman (12/5/11). It reminds me of how obsessed I was with sex. I would keep track of the date, time, and place of my last having sex, and go crazy if it was more than 48 hours ago.
Consider trying to focus on dealing with your CSA issues with a therapist. When you begin to make progress on them, your unease with sex may begin to fade. Therapy takes time, effort, a williness to face the pain, and total honesty. But you CAN make progress. Go for it.
Seems I've got to have a change of scene
Every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it could have been
Left here on my own or so it seems
I've got to leave before I start to screamJoe Cocker