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#432731 - 04/28/13 10:18 AM just can't believe....
ThisMan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/13
Posts: 767
Loc: upper south
I just can't believe I have been triggered into believing I was partly responsible for the ASA. I am pissed.
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#432810 - 04/29/13 01:53 AM Re: just can't believe.... [Re: ThisMan]
crazy gecko Offline


Registered: 10/04/12
Posts: 309
Originally Posted By: ThisMan
I am pissed.

I think pissed is a healthy place to be, considering what you went through over the last few days (yes, I saw the other thread). Use your anger to do something positive about this, like finding a new T.
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#432828 - 04/29/13 08:46 AM Re: just can't believe.... [Re: crazy gecko]
Farmer Boy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/23/12
Posts: 442
Loc: Australia
Originally Posted By: crazy gecko
Originally Posted By: ThisMan
I am pissed.

I think pissed is a healthy place to be, considering what you went through over the last few days (yes, I saw the other thread). Use your anger to do something positive about this, like finding a new T.


I'm with Gecko on this. You should be pissed. If you have other options for a T I would explore them. You do not pay her to make you feel like 'that'.

Being a 'nice guy' is not asking to be raped or stalked or whatever.

You have done NOTHING wrong. You did not bring this on yourself. He was a bastard - pure and simple.
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#433643 - 05/05/13 07:25 PM Re: just can't believe.... [Re: ThisMan]
Tyr Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/05/11
Posts: 180
No one asks for rape. Though sadly some guys get off on the power trip in a spectrum of deviance.

That being said, to make the transition (on one's own timeline) from victim to survivor... one needs to be capable of looking at ones self a bit honestly and at least asking .... risk management questions. good luck
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#434091 - 05/09/13 01:24 AM Re: just can't believe.... [Re: ThisMan]
ThisMan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/13
Posts: 767
Loc: upper south
crazy gecko and farmer... thanks guys. pissed is a good place to be. its a place i seldom visit, and it gives me the realization that i should be here more often. And as you know, I have left the former T, and now have a new T. Hopefully, he won't make such damaging remarks by blaming the victim. That's like stepping back in time.

And Tyr, thanks for the advice. I am pretty honest with myself, and there is no way I can be responsible for what happened on that day, because it was the day of my surgery. drugged, cut, repaired, stitched.... both sides. The only way to avoid the assault was to 1. not have had the surgery - wasn't an option... and 2. to not have trusted ... what a dreadful way to live, as I have found out since that day.

I would like to hear more of what you mean by risk management if you get the chance to share.


Edited by ThisMan (05/09/13 01:27 AM)
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