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#434018 - 05/08/13 09:45 AM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
concerned_husky Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/29/12
Posts: 546
Second everything everyone has said on here.

Life's a Dream - I haven't spoken to you much on here but I'm glad you cut him out of your life. He doesn't deserve you, and him spoiling you doesn't justify all of the other emotional abuse he's inflicted on you. At all. If anything the 'nice' things he's done for you is a form of power and control, something he uses to guilt-trip you. He sounds like a textbook narcissist. It's inspiring reading about the actions you've taken for yourself...I for one have one too many of these narcissists pulling at me in my life, I'm going to enjoy cutting them off like swatting flies.

Hanging around with these self-inflated baboons can make you forget how great life can be.
_________________________
The ratio of good to bad people in this world will always be tipped in favor of the latter. Always. But that ratio in your own social circle, you can control. And there, and only there, can the balance be favorably tipped, so that those who love you far outnumber those who don't.

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#434019 - 05/08/13 09:54 AM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
Farmer Boy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/23/12
Posts: 442
Loc: Australia
LAD

I have to say this might be the first RIGHT move you have made with this guy.

I am proud of you for standing up for yourself.

Lee
_________________________
More than meets the eye!

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#434021 - 05/08/13 10:14 AM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3566
Loc: South-East Europe
Originally Posted By: Life's A Dream
this still pisses me off: he has repeatedly made jokes about my dad raping me. Ironically, it's the same goddamn dynamic I've always had with my dad "Well, he pays for me, so I better do whatever he says/let him walk all over me". Last night was the last straw. I didn't unload on him then and there, cuz I wouldn't have had a ride home if I did.

LAD I congratulation you on acknowledging crossing of your borders to your "friend".
Weather is just talk, chat or sharing intimacy (including sex) we should take care for ourselves in first place. As you wrote and described already many such situations I encourage you to look further and look for things that you are feeling like bad and hurtful so you would be able to recognize it next time. We all need education about it...
In any case it is good that you followed your inner feelings and that you articulate it loudly. I hope your friend has heard it and get the message. Many times it is needed more to do to stop such relationships and protect ourselves.
I'm encouraging you to try to listen that inner voice that doesn't like to be mistreated like that!


Edited by peroperic2009 (05/08/13 10:17 AM)
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#434022 - 05/08/13 10:16 AM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 1867
Loc: durham, north england
Lad, congrats on standing up for yourself. frankly it sounds like this idiot uses his money because he's too pathetic to go and better ways of relating to people, so he just bludgions people into what he wants, ---- eg, instead of admitting that he knows less than you about hydrogen bonding, he tells you to shut up. Sadly, I've met a fair few people like that, indeed I remember once telling a Marquis "tough luck" when he was attempting to get me to bend certain rules in connection with my department on his behalf simply because of his title.

Another thing to remember, is that if he's really got! that much money, he's not really giving you anything, since it's no inconvenience to him, after all a hundred pounds from a multimillionaire means nothing, but the same amount from someone earning 20 k a year is very different, since they've sacrificed a good amount of what they have.

I actually had to think this one out myself since one friend of mine earns about eighty thousand pounds a year, as well as having a whacking inheritance, (that's about 130 usd). Whenever we get together for a drink, I'll provide coffee, --- good coffee made by me for about seven pounds fifty, while my friend will turn up with a sixty quid bottle of wisky to go with it.

I felt really guilty about this, since to me something that expensive, if I have it at all is not something to be drunk just when we get together. Then however I realized that to him, that wisky was the same approximate price as 7.50 of decent coffee is to me.

If we go out anyywhere and share a taxi, we do just that, split the price, ditto if we see a film, indeed I usually use my disability discount to get my friend a free tickit.

So, i'd question weather this wealthy idiot was really giving you anything at all, ---- not if he was giving no actual friendship, making really nasty and hurtful jokes at your expense and behaviour like a total git.

good riddence to him

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#434051 - 05/08/13 03:37 PM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
Life's A Dream Offline


Registered: 08/25/11
Posts: 886
Loc: Bouvet Island
Thank you to all of you. I wish I wasn't so exhausted and discouraged right now, or I'd address each of your responses individually. I suck.

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#434053 - 05/08/13 03:54 PM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
bodyguard8367 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/16/12
Posts: 1159
Loc: ""
""


Edited by bodyguard8367 (02/27/14 03:01 PM)

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#434054 - 05/08/13 04:29 PM Re: Did I make the right move? [Re: Life's A Dream]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1203
Bryan - it was the perfect move to jump out of his pocket. No question. Congratulations!
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