I discussed this with my father yesterday, as he came to my house for a few items stored here.
We ended up having a conversation that danced around my abandonment of a seemingly brilliant career, as well as his very significant role in world-supply of food and armament.
I really have no regrets in not being able to go back to that world as its simply not an option. Its not a choice. Its a condition of reality. But he has always been hyper-sensitive to time passage.
Again...no regrets here regarding my use of my time. I think I did more than could have been expected. I have a LOT of life's substance to look-back upon, as does he.
I hope some of my positioning served to quell his thoughts that I'm pissing my life away...that right now, I'm just trying to exist...and that's good enough right now.