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#430832 - 04/11/13 12:59 AM Made appointment to see a counselor
Dave PNW Offline


Registered: 04/03/13
Posts: 111
Loc: Pacific Northwest
I just made an appointment today to see a counselor next Thursday. Honestly I'm Scared. Hope this turns out okay. I guess even if he is not great, it will give me a chance to disclose some of this in person and help me start to put a plan together. Some of you have told me that every time I tell my story it loses some of its power over me. Any advice? Emotionally drained today. Fucking vulnerable.

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#430835 - 04/11/13 01:25 AM Re: Made appointment to see a counselor [Re: Dave PNW]
DavoSwim Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/06/13
Posts: 326
Loc: Iowa, USA
DW
Congratulations on taking another step in your recovery. Remember to take it at your own pace. My advice is to remember that it's your recovery, and you are in charge. You need to make sure that you are comfortable with the T, and that you trust him. If it takes a few tries to find the right one, that' okay. It doesn't reflect badly on you, in fact it shows that you know what you are seeking. Please be honest with the T, but don't reveal anything before you're ready. The T has likely heard everything before, but for you it's the first time, and you get to dictate the pace and the content. Good luck. You deserve this.
DavO

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#430839 - 04/11/13 01:57 AM Re: Made appointment to see a counselor [Re: Dave PNW]
learning2remember Offline
Member

Registered: 10/21/03
Posts: 261
Loc: Europe
Congratulations. I hope things work out. Therapy is sometimes tough, but nothing was tougher for me than making that call. You did it. Good for you.
_________________________
"This is not my shame, this is their shame." Mona Eltahawy

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#430849 - 04/11/13 04:01 AM Re: Made appointment to see a counselor [Re: Dave PNW]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1513
Loc: New England
Good move,DW! Hope this turns out well for you, but if this T isn't all you hoped for, try another one. It might feel worse before it feels better. Just keep going till you see daylight.

Jude
_________________________
I went back to the doctor
To get another shrink.
I sit and tell him about my weekend,
But he never betrays what he thinks.
Can you see the real me, doctor?.
The Who

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#430854 - 04/11/13 06:04 AM Re: Made appointment to see a counselor [Re: Dave PNW]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3603
Loc: South-East Europe
Hi dw1972+,
congratulations on your courage, you are doing great things for yourself!
I know that it looks scary but please be calm there is no reason to be scared of that appointment.
Look on it like this: you are going to meet someone, you are looking to see would you like what you'll hear/see there, you are going to check what would emerged in future from that relationship, how will go and similar things. It is like sort of shopping if I may say like that.
I can say that when I have had such appointment I was also very anxious about it. I didn't have any clues about therapy nor what to expect. I went there full of many thoughts.
I meet my T (she is nice lady) we started talking and I was felt like on fire. I started talking and I brought many things at once like that would be the first and last our meeting, lol. I told everything: touching by other boys, touching with own twin, later sex with him, confused feelings, porn addiction, problems with girls and intimacy and many more. It was way too much form current perspective, lol. It was too early and not done under best conditions.
We need for our therapy to be successful to feel safe with it, to feel good and safe with our T and to have built some mutual trust. For all that time is needed, it is process and look on it like that.
So please take your time, there is no need for panic, first appointment is just one step in that direction. There is no need to push anything.
Don't be afraid!

Pero
_________________________
My story

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#430863 - 04/11/13 09:45 AM Re: Made appointment to see a counselor [Re: Dave PNW]
csasurvivor1992 Offline


Registered: 03/25/13
Posts: 132
Loc: Texas
CONGRATS DW!

I am excited for you and proud of you. It is a HUGE step you are taking, so you're anxiety is spot on. I was excited and nervous when I started almost a year ago.

As soon as I started, all of the inner monologue started to make sense. I was still very down on myself, it didn't get better right away, but it starts to make sense. I remember feeling like therapy was the right move for me... it was so validating.

Like the others have said, be nice to yourself and give it time... it takes time. This one may not be the right one and that's okay. Or this could be the person you've been waiting for your whole life. Either way, be kind to yourself. You deserved better.

You deserved and deserve better. And you going to see a T shouts that from the mountaintops... good for you brother! Good luck!
_________________________
May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground, carry on. ~Fun.

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