people do better when I'm not around
People laugh louder when I don't make a sound
People smile brighter if I'm not in their sight
People sing softer on a Jacobless night.
I think I am a runt
Destined to be eaten by my peers
I think I was hurt
So the more important would be spared.
I think there were multiple perps
Because I was already spilt milk
Like nature's way of containing the problem
Gang up on the one who is already sick
Do I exist
just so that others
could stay clean?
Was God's plan
to sacrifice my soul
to make me a machine?
A friend once said to me
he'd never marry a non-virgin
because they are damaged goods.
What does that make me?
He was a fool and very wrong.
But the phrase is in my head.
No sense trying to fix it now.
Might as well feed him to the pigs.
Might as well, right?
I mean, it would make sense
for God to do that.
If he's not going to stop the monsters
might as well round them up
get them to all feed at the same trough
get them to all hurt the same kids
better then everyone getting hurt
The Ancient Athenians sent 14 children
to feed the Minotaur.
It was either that or have the entire town
That's who I am.
The child of Athens,
sacrificed so the rest of the children
would never know what true pain is.
The first time was a tragedy.
The rest? Eh, might as well.
Better than some other kid.
Some child who still deserves love.
"As long as the child within is not allowed to become aware of what happened to him or her, a part of his or her emotional life will remain frozen . . . all appeals to love, solidarity, and compassion will be useless."
-- Alice Miller