Hey Life, I'm so sorry for your struggles.
But if you are having a lot of problems and they are emerging while on meds you have to talk with someone because it should be helpful not otherwise.
Your problems are definitely connected to abuse, there is no doubt about it. And please look how to protect yourself, I'm not sure but I think that direct talk would never help if some sadistic monster is at other side. Someone who was capable to abuse child so brutally would not admit...
PTSD, DID, nightmares, flash backs... - it could be good if you could work and talk with someone about trauma healing, even if you don't have T, there are lot of guys here who have a lot of knowledge, there are articles and books also.
I know that must be terrible difficult felt like stuck and not having memories, must be like obsession to find it, but man those other problems are present and if not even driving.
You are not alone, you have many friends here and we all like you and would love to see you feeling better, OK