Newest Members
kk90, Austintexan, Cancan, LS, PaulnMA
12256 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
closerthenveins (26), Nvolpicelli (24), Sven (19)
Who's Online
4 registered (watzupwitu, don64, 2 invisible), 60 Guests and 5 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12256 Members
73 Forums
63116 Topics
441385 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 2 of 2 < 1 2
Topic Options
#425390 - 02/15/13 03:44 PM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: peroperic2009]
Suwanee Offline
Greeter
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/30/12
Posts: 685
Loc: Southeast USA
Pero,

This can be pretty complex. For some reason, I don't really mind if others see me in an "exposed" state. I spent many years swimming and diving---and a swimmer's uniform isn't modest. I'm not gonna be embarrassed by a Speedo.

The one season I tried wrestling bothered me more because the weigh-ins before the meets were a little awkward. You had to step on the scales wearing just your tighty-whities. This was in front of my coach, the other teams' coaches and a meet official. I felt like they were inspecting livestock. Not fun. Maybe they do it differently now...

I'm more bothered by being in close proximity---like you say---in a locker room situation with a lot of others. I'm claustrophobic...so that adds to the effect. I just want to get in and out. I'm operating on the premise that no one is looking at me...and if they are...well, that's another thread.

Will
_________________________
Cruel Summer
My Journal

-Signs and traces left in stone
Ruins of a past unknown-

Top
#425411 - 02/15/13 06:39 PM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: Ivo]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3599
Loc: South-East Europe
Originally Posted By: Ivo
Dear brother I am not sure what you want me to tell. Germany in general is very specific country and their approach to nakedness is very relaxed and tolerant so no one pays much attention but it can be weird sometimes for non Germans.

Hey brother, well I was wondering could you bring us some other perspective in more details, lol.
And I would like to hear how are you deal with it concerning you are CSA?
_________________________
My story

Top
#425412 - 02/15/13 06:42 PM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: dark empathy]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3599
Loc: South-East Europe
Originally Posted By: dark empathy
@Pero, I really applaud what you do biking and swimming, as I said for myself it's something I just couldn't albeit that I'd want to. Even when i spent a week in Egypt a couple of years ago and people were, ---- due to the climate as you said, all wandering around in swimming gear I wore a T shirt constantly.
Again, I really can't imagine a situation where I could be comfortable with other people seeing even my torso in any capacity without forming some quite new associations, indeed even in situations when people around me are waring very little like at the swimming pool I'd rather be the odd one out wearing a shirt than risk someone seeing me.
So, congrats to you on overcoming this.


Thanks Luke, we all have some limits and issues that are not easy to deal with, but step by step with some time definitely gives result. It worth trying!
_________________________
My story

Top
#425413 - 02/15/13 06:54 PM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: Suwanee]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3599
Loc: South-East Europe
Hi Will,
thanks for adding your input.
I can imagine scene with weigh-ins in front of people in underwear frown

Yes I get you completely with wanting to get in and out as soon as possible. I never felt watched near looker room, but if I did I'd be more than uncomfortable. Being once at medical check where I felt too exposed and watched by assistant.
Let's say that he payed attention more than I was comfortable while I was laying half naked on bed, I would add that my blood pressure and heart beats were not quite normal during that check, lol.

Pero
_________________________
My story

Top
#425415 - 02/15/13 07:13 PM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: peroperic2009]
newground Offline
Chatroom Moderator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 10/11/11
Posts: 741
Loc: michigan
hey pero
I have to tell you I hadn't read this post till now cause even the title is kinda triggering to me for some reason. I had a very similar experience last year about this time. I had taken a group of boys to a public pool to swim. I have been in locker rooms many times I used to swim as a boy too. but in this small room that was sooooo packed full and one of the boys had trouble with his suit and asked me to help him. I wasn't real comfortable but I helped get the knot out and they were all off to swim. I was alone then and began to change into a suit when I had a complete panic attack! I just had to get the hell out of there and I was crying and my head was going nuts! I was so glad I had some others there to help me watch the boys cause I lost it. I haven't been back to the gym or pool since then frown it was really awkward trying to make an excuse for not going in swimming except for the one boy who is csa and knows about mine too. sorry for the long story but had to let ya know that you are not alone
_________________________
Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee. let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!"
Herman Melville

Top
#425447 - 02/16/13 01:55 AM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: newground]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3599
Loc: South-East Europe
Hey Newground,
I'm sorry if title was triggering for you as well as overall story. It seems like you have had something like panic attack back than frown
I hope you'll find way to go there again if you like to swim or go to gym.
Maybe to go to some other place with bigger locker room and where you could felt more relaxed for start? It would be good if you could have some friends with you?

We need you in good shape here wink !
_________________________
My story

Top
#426835 - 03/01/13 07:40 AM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: peroperic2009]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3599
Loc: South-East Europe
Just to add something here I went again with my friends to same sport center and same locker room; this time it was empty and without any triggering situations and I've had great time with my friends.

I've also just sent link of MS to girl friend who told me two weeks ago about disclosure of her friend survivor so I hope he will have courage to come here and search for additional support.

Pero
_________________________
My story

Top
#426959 - 03/02/13 05:24 PM Re: locker room- possible triggers [Re: peroperic2009]
txb Offline


Registered: 02/03/13
Posts: 181
Originally Posted By: peroperic2009
Just to add something here I went again with my friends to same sport center and same locker room; this time it was empty and without any triggering situations and I've had great time with my friends.

I've also just sent link of MS to girl friend who told me two weeks ago about disclosure of her friend survivor so I hope he will have courage to come here and search for additional support.

Pero

Hey. I'm really glad to read that you went back and it all went so well. That's really good news. It's hard to go back and try something again when you have a bad experience but I think doing stuff with friends is really important for your mental health. I went out last night - spent weeks dreading the whole thing, but it was really awesome in the end. I think a lot of the time what I imagine could happen is completely different to what happens in reality.

Top
Page 2 of 2 < 1 2


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.