She truly saved my life. One should read the title and poem from the point of view of the spouse (or significant other) of a survivor speaking to the survivor himself. The "pain" is that which I witnessed as I watched her deal with me. The words are those SHE spoke to ME. But her pain was undeniable. And I loved her all the more for believing in me and for waiting for my transition. And I miss her. This theme dealt with the CSA way back when, but it is as relevant to me today in dealing with the ASA. Except of course, that her words are memory now. (Yes, I am sad tonight. Not in self-pity, just sad... big difference.) And after my month of being here, I suppose I truly feel it is a safe place where other men understand and I am not such an anomaly as maybe I have thought. btw...Rebecca was her name.

Rebecca's Pain
(from her to me)

Why do you cry?
So quietly- so sadly
in the darkest hour of night?
Why do you turn your head
when I look into your face?

I want only to help you,
to listen to your words,
to share your thoughts,
to be with you.
But you make it so hard.

I feel your hurt,
not all of the pain,
but feel it I do.
I share your tears
and I long to wipe them away
but I can't....

Please,
cry no more.
You are safe with me

and I....
I give you all I have to offer
....my heart
....my trust.

Angels, my friends.

Exceptional, and painful.

Many many times we are so involved in our own pain that we are surprised when confronted with the reality of how our pain affects those around us....

G

Oh shit.

You know, this poem describes exactly what I see in my girlfriend's eyes... I hope that one day I can be the man she believes I can be...