Love that you are so brave and speak openly about your shame and guilt and SSA.
MANY of us have grappled with that demon.
Some of us are now gay. (I am One LGBT)
Some of us are straight. (And yet have SSA)
Some of us are Bi. (finding comfort in both)
Some of us don't fit in neat categories. (Yet we are here too).
Therapy can be acceptance. It is that when you deal with the past, and put things in their proper place, you will no longer need to feel such intense shame associated with your SSA. You may not even feel any shame connected with it. You may still have it but be totally amused by it and not find it difficult to ignore. You may still have it and allow it to become more a part of your life. The real trick is to acquire the ability to accept the way things are, to learn to be yourself as you are without the intense feelings of guilt and shame.
I turned out Gay, but that is like what works for me. Be you, Do you, and if it takes some women's couture and some boyfriends, lets hope like hell that you can navigate it all with some sense of pride and love for you. Good Luck Irishguym, we are all pulling for you bro.
-a fellow survivor.