I think we are maybe not too different.
I think people see through me. And that they see me as weak.
But I am not weak, so if they see that, then they are wrong.
No matter how perceptive they think they are.
I am not weak.
I FEEL weak. But I am alive. I am still fighting.
I am better than I was and someday I will be even better than I am now.
Even if somewhere between now and then I fall down.
I have gone through more than the people who call me weak.
They don't know what strength is.
They stand with nothing on their back and complain about little things.
I trudge along with this boulder on my back and still manage to survive.
If I am keeled over, it is because my load is heavy.
That is strength, not weakness.
I am not a coward.
I face realities every day
that would make lesser men turn away
and pretend that things are fine.
Those who don't understand wouldn't last a day in my position.
At least, not without their entire universe being shattered.
I have a stuffed wolf puppy who I sleep with every night.
I am not ashamed of him.
He has been a better friend to me than most of humanity.
I was strong and clever enough
To find a friend when I needed one.
That is not weakness,
it is the strength to place survival over society's stupid rules.
I did nothing wrong.
They did it.
I am the hero.
I am the warrior.
If others can't see that,
They are blind, not me.
I am often lonely.
My wife often doesn't understand.
I've never been able to hold down a full-time job.
I feel like people get sick of me.
I don't have all the answers to this.
But I am not alone.
And I will not be ashamed.
And I am not weak.
And you aren't either.
We are Strong.
"As long as the child within is not allowed to become aware of what happened to him or her, a part of his or her emotional life will remain frozen . . . all appeals to love, solidarity, and compassion will be useless."
-- Alice Miller