Many of us resorted to various addictions to cope with what was done to us. Sex, alcohol, drugs, work, porn have been ways of numbing the pain and escaping the memories. Addictions rarely can be overcome on your own. A good therapist, and a support group (in my case AA) can make all the difference.
...I personally found a partner (wife) that is down for continued exploration and all out all nighters...
And BTW A270465, does your wife have any sisters? LOL
"And it's run for the roses as fast as you can
Your fate is delivered, your moment's at hand
It's the chance of a lifetime, in a lifetime of chance
And it's high time you joined in the dance"-Dan Fogelberg