As a 9yr old I was assaulted by two older boys.
The only way I was able to deal with the situation was to put the incident in a room in my head and lock the door.
31yrs later the locks of that door are opening & its affecting my day to day life.
For the first time ever I told someone (my wife) what happened & she suggested I speak to my GP to be referred for counselling.
I'm meeting him today, however, I dont know what to say to him as I'm not sure I can re-tell my tale.
Any advice?

this is a good start, mrgoggs!

if you need to, print this out and take it with you and read it out loud. my T had me write a lot when we first started. it helped me organize my thoughts and start to process things before we even met. even if you say no more than this, you have communicated the essence -
1. what happened to you.
2. how you dealt with it.
3. what is going on now.
4. why you are seeing him.

he can ask questions for more details if needed. or you can fill in more between the main points. chances are, once you get started, it will be difficult to stop. it is such a relief to finally let it out.

you can do it. you can practice on us if you need to. we get it. most of us have been where you are now. come back and let us know how it goes, please.

Lee

ANYONE....any doctor will fully understand if you have to write it out on paper.

I found myself falling apart badly when I told my GP. Lots of folks have used the "hand him a sheet o paper" method.

BTW: I was abused by older boys too. I know it poses its own collection of reasons to not disclose...but know this...nearly half of all cases are perpetrated by other kids. Do let us know how the doc visit goes.

Do not be afaid of the jouney, there is a better place. It took almost three years for me to tell my"T" everything. It is hard but worth the trip. Find a good "T" who has worked with males. Also know that you are not alone.

Hi mrgoggs,
welcome to Male Survivor!
Be aware that you are not alone , I'm sad to know about your abuse but healing is possible even many years later every one of us is sort of evidence for that. I found great support here!

I would suggest you not to give some details in that talk with which you are not comfortable or that could be emotionally too exhausting for you. Saying that you were abused and that you have later problems should be more than enough.
When I visited my therapist first time I didn't know what to expect and I was scared and worrying. When I meet her I told her in short all my story. Later she told me that was not necessary, trust and supportive relationship between therapist and client is something that is gradually building so there is no need to force anything. For start just couple of facts should be more than enough. Same goes for your talk with GP.
So please don't push yourself!

Pero

Did it. Was too hard to explain so handed him the note I had written.
Glad I did it. Small steps

Sehr gut!

I hope his reaction was acceptable to you.

A tough day for you.

Welcome mrgroggs!

It took me 42 years to begin coming to terms with what happened to me at 13. It took me 10 years of therapy, before I could actually say the words. The good news it that I finally did it and am making progress. You will too if you do the work fearlessly and don't give up.

Be aware that not every therapist is trained for dealing with CSA trauma. Read the thread here on how to pick a therapist for help: A Consumer's Guide To Therapists. If your current counselor isn't working out, don't be afraid to change. This is about YOU!
Good luck and keep asking for help. You will always get it here.

Jude