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#420640 - 01/01/13 08:06 PM the end/start to nothing changes
dragon Offline


Registered: 04/17/12
Posts: 354
Loc: on the river between Hades n V...
sitting here and pondering what was last year
looking forward and wondering what this year holds
i'm come so far haven't i?
why am i still here nowhere then?

i traveled this dark road alone and confused
one day i met you and life changed
i gained understanding and hope
before the year was out it was stolen from me

i came traveling with you by my side as my protector
a true brother who taught me the meaning of kinship
one who never batted an eye at accepting me
one who stood by me when my road changed to a darker route

We traveled on together from that one night
we found another on my route into the darkness
He became another true brother to me and your love
known to each other years passed and reunited years later

Three together then and things didn't look so dark
Acceptance and understanding brought us together
A life in darkness and secrecy we found each other
A family brought together and made traveling into a new year

Faltering steps and landing hard at times but together
My love joined us and one the same as my true brother
Two older ones caring for two younger ones
This was my family

Somewhere between old and new it changed
My true brother was stolen away from me
Changed and forgotten who we were as a unit
Struggling to remember but now not ever going to remember fully

My gorgeous talented love was hence taken thereafter
my life crumbled in front of me and nothing to stop it
a true brother gone, a love gone, and a true brother in pieces
The old year ended horribly

facing a new year of uncertainty sucks
i will never get back fully my true brother or my love
both have lost memories so dear to them
i can't ever forget and it makes it hard to walk forward

i want to run back into the darkness
back into the old year
wishing to change the things that ended horribly
wishing to just jump to this point together still with all memories

i feel like mourning as the year ended
mourning over a death of everything i knew and had
but i am not to mourn really
they are still here alive just without memories of things and points

two now standing together that should be strong
faltering and falling apart
what does a new year enthrall?
how i hate the changing years

I sit here pondering the new year
hoping for some light in the darkness
maybe a miracle that they remember fully
and just to be together as a family we once were

i sit here as the new year came and the old one ended
in the darkness
and as it rolled in
nothing felt the same nor did it feel changed
_________________________
I don't want to look back;I just want to start again;Somebody save me--- Pop Evil: Broken and Betrayed

I want justice I want you overthrown;I want courage I want to stand alone;I want your arrogance and I want your pain;I want your everything and I want you dead--- Rev Theory: Justice

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#420673 - 01/02/13 05:55 AM Re: the end/start to nothing changes [Re: dragon]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3566
Loc: South-East Europe
Very nice poem Dragon, I like it a lot!
I wish you the best in this year. Please keep fighting for yourself and your kids.

When I meet couple of buddies last year and found about destructive forces that have challenged them as survivors who were left alone without any support and when I've learned for later outcome I was wondering has there been any possibility to do something, to reach somehow, to try to see what is coming and to try to avoid it.

I'm still not sure what is the correct answer and could something be different now. But I have feeling that we as community completely failed, we didn't even try to help frown

The most of all hurting me knowing for "friends/family" who were cause of all pains to my brothers survivors. How can they live every day not thinking of their crimes?
Nothing has left after them, just couple of imprisoned young-men...
I can't help myself and to stop thinking where are those bastards now and what are they doing. It could be easily that they are involved into damaging and hurting some new victims frown
I spit on earth where they walk...

I'm praying for miracle to happen, with such monsters waiting on every corner around even that would not be enough.

Please know that you are one of my heroes!
If I'd decide to get some formal education related to therapy be aware that you and other brothers who are going trough the worst are my biggest inspiration.
You all deserve only the best from this world.

Here is my warmest hug for you
((((Jayy))))

Pero

_________________________
My story

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