Thanks Mike

I am already driving an hour to the "city" (big town) to go to this group. This is really my only option. I will talk to the people running the group first. That sounds like a good idea.

Lee

PS. Chances are there could be other guys using drugs and alcohol to cover up the pain of CSA. 1 in 6 right?

Whome, Glad to hear(or read) from you! I think of you offten buddy because of the trials and tribulations that you are going through with your wife were simular to ours.
My wife and I began attending a group called Recovering Couples (RCA),
This was done over the phone on Sunday nights with many other couples that were (of course) having problems with their marriage/partnership.
I cannot begin to tell you how much this meeting helped us to regain our love and appriciation for each other.
One thing that sticks in my mind is how we treated each other.

We found that we treated a complete stranger off the street better than we treated each other. How screwed up is that!
The laughter in our home is now becoming the norm and the tears of pain and confustion have now began to dry up. Tears of joy now replace then painful side effects of my abuse and addictions.

Check it out, we have people from all over the world and all walks of life attending this phone meeting. It is a gift to us.

God Bless

Thanks for sharing!

I found incredibly valuable tools in SAA (another 12 step fellowship, same steps) to deal with my unhealthy sexuality and compulsions.

Only later did i make the connection that most of my Sexuality then was rooted in my abuse and other trauma and insecurities growing up - and compounded by years of psychically destructive behavior).

The best thing is that recovery has helped me discover and reclaim a beautiful and powerful sexuality that was inconceivable before. Working the steps with a sponsor Going to meetings, and reading about sexual addictions has broken my isolation, shame and feelings of hopelessness around sex.

Of course, I avoided facing this issue and myself for over a decade, so the price of my dishonesty and resitance was pretty high- but the rewards from finally looking at this stuff are amazing.

LAD, Farmer Boy,
I dont go to any other SLAA meetings where I live, but out of the 20 to 30 men that attend our regular weekly meeting I would say that at least 75 to 80% of them were in one way or the other sexually abused in their adolesent years.
Just like us survivors, some worse than others, but with the same pain and end results, "A fucked up way of thinking".
After my very fisrt meeting that I was litterally draged to, I left thinking about how all these people knew my story! They had to have known because their story was just like mine!
So please don't be wary of speaking up and telling your story of how your addiction started. You may just open the door for others to open up also.

God Bless

MB, you have always been a true glimmer of hope for me and I appriciate you and your hard work to get to where you are in life.
Light at the end of the tunnel is a wonderful vision to hold on to.
God Bless

Hay Lee,

Every one here is right, this is the way out. The last thing I was saying was to hold back any not brake the silence, isolation and shame. This is the way out of addiction. Take the option you have in frount of you. This is a timing thing as much as anything. You are ready! Take the option. We are all proud of you and proud of your strong determination. I will be praying for you as well.

This is going to work out for you Lee.

Stay brave,

Mike