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#420763 - 01/03/13 01:19 AM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
jbodean Offline


Registered: 01/20/11
Posts: 9
He posted a goodbye and said that he was going to back away from posting for awhile because he was feeling triggered and not in a healthy space when reading/responding. I really feel for him and hope he is OK.

I was moved by what he was saying because there have been times in my life when I've felt very lonely and felt that no one could possibly understand what I was feeling or going through. Like I was watching the world through a glass barrier that I could never break through. That other people had lives filled with happiness and love that would never be afforded to me. That death was the only release.

I know that sometimes that dark space can becon like a comforting, old friend, but I also know that it gets better. Sometimes it is a struggle for me to be present in the moment and not disassociate myself from what I am feeling. I know that letting go of anger and self-loathing can sometimes be difficult. I also know that if you are willing to step out of that dark space and open yourself up, life is waiting beyond that glass. It's not all sunshine and freakin roses, but having an authentic experience is worth the struggle. It's a little piece that I win back.

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#420833 - 01/03/13 01:57 PM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1166
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/16/13 09:13 PM)
_________________________
Depression Feels Like Home, and Happiness is Just a Place I Visit

It will get better....

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#420867 - 01/03/13 06:20 PM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1388
Loc: California
Hi guys,

I'm fine. Thanks for your concern. I need to stop posting for a while because I have been triggered by people caring to respond and offer support. And in the triggering, I've been responding with less than kindness, and that's not healthy for me, and doesn't support a safe environment for others.

I'll be abstaining from posting, but will continue reading.

Thanks again guys.

D
_________________________
It's a heroes journey, and you are the hero.

Loving Kindness Meditation will dramatically improve your spirits; give it a try for just 3 days: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sz7cpV7ERsM

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#420891 - 01/03/13 09:48 PM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1166
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/16/13 09:13 PM)
_________________________
Depression Feels Like Home, and Happiness is Just a Place I Visit

It will get better....

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#420894 - 01/03/13 10:25 PM . [Re: Magellan]
Life's A Dream Offline


Registered: 08/25/11
Posts: 886
Loc: Bouvet Island
.


Edited by Life's A Dream (01/12/13 08:27 PM)

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#420954 - 01/04/13 08:29 AM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1166
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/17/13 10:23 AM)
_________________________
Depression Feels Like Home, and Happiness is Just a Place I Visit

It will get better....

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#421067 - 01/05/13 01:40 AM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3301
Loc: back in the USA
Originally Posted By: Magellan
I'm fine. Thanks for your concern.
...
I'll be abstaining from posting, but will continue reading


This made my day!!!
Thanks, D.

Lee
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9

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