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#420763 - 01/03/13 01:19 AM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
jbodean Offline


Registered: 01/20/11
Posts: 9
He posted a goodbye and said that he was going to back away from posting for awhile because he was feeling triggered and not in a healthy space when reading/responding. I really feel for him and hope he is OK.

I was moved by what he was saying because there have been times in my life when I've felt very lonely and felt that no one could possibly understand what I was feeling or going through. Like I was watching the world through a glass barrier that I could never break through. That other people had lives filled with happiness and love that would never be afforded to me. That death was the only release.

I know that sometimes that dark space can becon like a comforting, old friend, but I also know that it gets better. Sometimes it is a struggle for me to be present in the moment and not disassociate myself from what I am feeling. I know that letting go of anger and self-loathing can sometimes be difficult. I also know that if you are willing to step out of that dark space and open yourself up, life is waiting beyond that glass. It's not all sunshine and freakin roses, but having an authentic experience is worth the struggle. It's a little piece that I win back.

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#420833 - 01/03/13 01:57 PM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1235
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/16/13 09:13 PM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

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#420867 - 01/03/13 06:20 PM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1428
Loc: California
Hi guys,

I'm fine. Thanks for your concern. I need to stop posting for a while because I have been triggered by people caring to respond and offer support. And in the triggering, I've been responding with less than kindness, and that's not healthy for me, and doesn't support a safe environment for others.

I'll be abstaining from posting, but will continue reading.

Thanks again guys.

D
_________________________
If I'm acting despondent, Please ask me if I'm eating sugar. I keep forgetting sugar makes me crazy.

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#420891 - 01/03/13 09:48 PM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1235
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/16/13 09:13 PM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

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#420894 - 01/03/13 10:25 PM . [Re: Magellan]
Life's A Dream Offline


Registered: 08/25/11
Posts: 886
Loc: Bouvet Island
.


Edited by Life's A Dream (01/12/13 08:27 PM)

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#420954 - 01/04/13 08:29 AM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1235
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/17/13 10:23 AM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

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#421067 - 01/05/13 01:40 AM Re: I want to die [Re: Magellan]
traveler Online   confused
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3493
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Originally Posted By: Magellan
I'm fine. Thanks for your concern.
...
I'll be abstaining from posting, but will continue reading


This made my day!!!
Thanks, D.

Lee
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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