Well, I lost my cool again last night. I hate it, because I know how I used to feel when my father went off on me. My son doesnít do what heís asked, and in fact seems to do the complete opposite on purpose. It flies all over me, and last night, I exploded. It wasnít even what he did, but that he stared me in the face and out and out lied to me, denying he did anything. I wish I was more patient and understanding. I wish I could be perfectly calm no matter what, but Iím just not. As my first therapy session grows closer, I really hope I can get a handle on my anger and depression. I donít want to damage my kids, or loose my family over it.
My wife and I were doing so well too. I had managed to confront her over how I felt unfulfilled with our sex life, and with the low level of intimacy we had. We were working really hard to move closer, but I know sheíll be pissed that I blew up again. I hope I havenít undone all the progress we made.
compassion is a light even to the darkest soul