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#419009 - 12/13/12 11:24 AM OCD (or others) and CSA
Bradley P Offline

Registered: 11/03/10
Posts: 44
Loc: AR
I was diagnosed with OCD at a very young age (11), and it continues to plague me.

As a kid, and even into my teenage years, I had the classic symptoms (symmetry, washing hands, cleanliness, nervous tics, etc...), and then as a teenager, it moved into religious scruples.

I'm literally just now realizing my OCD has been concentrating on sexual obsessions for a long time, and I never fully realized it. I've seen many posts here (and especially in the Sexual Identity forums) that seem like others share those OCD traits.

Does anyone else have OCD? How have you found it affects you in relation to abuse issues? How does it perhaps relate back to the abuse?

What about other mental disorders/illnesses?
"Life is for living, we all know...but I don't want to live it alone"-Chris Martin (Coldplay)

#419022 - 12/13/12 01:51 PM Re: OCD (or others) and CSA [Re: Bradley P]
Jude Offline

Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1596
Loc: New England
Yes, I have OCD. Yes it began to manifest after CSA. Yes, my initial obsession was fear of being gay. Also symmetry, orderliness, and cleanliness. Yes, I am also Bi-polar. Yes...yes...yes....But I had CBT (cognitive behavior therapy) about 10 years ago that helped a great deal with the OCD. I'm rarely bothered by symptoms now.

Seems I've got to have a change of scene
Every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it could have been
Left here on my own or so it seems
I've got to leave before I start to scream
Joe Cocker

#419029 - 12/13/12 02:34 PM * [Re: Bradley P]
Smalltown80sBoy Offline

Registered: 03/25/12
Posts: 2217

Edited by Smalltown80sBoy (04/29/13 01:20 PM)

#419052 - 12/13/12 07:03 PM Re: OCD (or others) and CSA [Re: Bradley P]
traveler Offline

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3509
Loc: somewhere in Africa
i get teased about some odd quirks. i never saw them as connected to SCA but more of a control issue - but since that probly originated in the abuse... i get it now.

one trait that others find funny is - when eating chips off a plate i HAVE to eat them in a certain order. if i eat them out of a bag it is OK to take them randomly - but if i can see them, i must eat the smallest broken pieces first - working my way up through the larger fragments to the smallest unbroken ones and finally the biggest perfect ones. (cue laugh track!)

so - i know this is not as troubling as full-on OCD - and i do have some other weird "things" - but i can understand on a limited scale - and i have learned not to fight it or try to hide it as much. i just laugh along with those who find me peculiar and try not to let it bother me - or let them see if i am bothered.

As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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